Ask anyone who’s been deep in the dating trenches for advice and they’ll tell you: No one really knows what they’re doing.
There’s a lot of dating advice on the Internet. A lot. Just as there are a slew of dating trends, apps, and mishap stories.
But what advice would you give your younger self when it comes to dating?
Listen: Mamamia’s new podcast ‘Eligible’ is the world’s first podcast dating show. This week’s episode introduces listeners to Bushra. Post continues below.
We asked 18 women exactly that question, because everyone has their own unique dating experiences and lessons they’ve learned along the way.
Their answers were hilarious, honest and oh-so-helpful.
From not placing so much emphasis on a person’s height to focusing on what you are attracted to, here’s what the women had to say.
1. Stop focusing on if THEY like you and being flattered by the fact THEY think you are attractive. Are YOU attracted, do YOU want to date them? That’s way more important.
2. Just because they are in a band, it does not make them cool.
3. Height doesn’t matter. It’s a stupid social construct and really shouldn’t dictate if you ‘like’ someone or not.
4. There’s no such thing as ‘always’ and ‘never’. Anything can happen and change the course of what you set out the relationship to be. So try not to get hung up on the idea of permanence. It will cloud your judgement.
5. Just because you’re a woman, doesn’t mean you can’t make the first move when you’re into someone!
6. The nice guys you turn down in your early twenties are going to be the guys you wish were available in your early thirties.
7. If someone says they don’t want kids, you can’t change their mind. Don’t waste 10 years.
8. Stop believing you can change anyone, full stop!
9. If you’re not comfortable with certain sexual acts, say no. Saying no doesn’t mean they’ll like you less.
10. A person’s relationship with their family and the way they treat their family can tell you a lot about them as a person. Pay attention to it!
Side note… Here’s how all the different star signs handle dating. Post continues below.
11. Learn. How. To. Masturbate. Then sex becomes more fun and you’re not looking for something in it that you can’t get.
12. CHILL OUT! You don’t have to date someone just because they show interest in you.
13. Realise that if someone is into you, they WILL ask you out.
14. Don’t pretend to like stuff the other person is into!! Be #authentic.
15. It’s not cool that they don’t have a driver’s licence and that his mum picks you up with him for dates.
16. Just because someone writes you a letter saying they like you and they think you like them, even though you’ve said you don’t, doesn’t mean you have to date them.
17. Stop being so driven by emotions – i.e. acting emotionally then texting or saying something you don’t mean. Take the time to assess how you’re feeling. Because chances are if you’re feeling so wildly hurt by something and are frustrated they are treating you badly, they’re not the right guy and you’re wasting your energy and time.
18. On misadventures in dating (this has got me through so many heartaches and it’s what I tell a friend with a fresh broken heart): One day you’ll wake up and realise that you didn’t even think of him/her/them yesterday.
Feature image: Getty.
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Top Comments
2. Just because they are in a band, it does not make them cool.
Ummm... I assume that depends on who the band is. I'm guessing this doesn't apply to all the supermodels with rock stars?
3. Height doesn’t matter. It’s a stupid social construct and really shouldn’t dictate if you ‘like’ someone or not.
It's actually amusing the way women so openly state (multiple) physical requirements in men, and so openly mock men who don't meet them, yet a man does any such thing, he's a sexist pig.