If you’re not being judged for the choices you make “as a mother” (including using that phrase to literally describe your status as a woman who has a child), how do you even know you’re a parent?
What we cook, what we wear, how often we look at our phones, whether we swear, or drink, or go out; it’s all fair game in the court of public opinion.
Especially, especially, if a mother works to earn an income.
This is something that every working woman knows to be true, and that every new mother learns very quickly.
Take for example Khloe Kardashian.
In the three months since the reality television star became a mother to daughter True, Khloe has been criticised for everything from her postpartum workouts, to stopping breastfeeding, to holding her baby incorrectly.
Sure, she’s a Kardashian, so she’s ‘asking for it’ – but she’s also just simply a new mum. Which is why there was a moment this week that broke her.
She explained her frustration with the constant negative backlash in a tweet, saying that “Mommy shamers r at a high right now.”
Khloe’s had enough, and so have I.
I’ve also written about society leaving women alone to earn a living (or not) however they choose, in an article called, “There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be rich; just don’t trample on people to get to the top“.
And now all of those pieces have just been summed up perfectly, in one perfect tweet.
So you can forget my lengthy rationales, and reasonings and musings. You can even set aside the concept of feminism, and Sheryl Sandberg’s Leaning In palaver (no disrespect).
The only argument we need here is that every mother has a right to choose what’s best for her and her family. All mothers feel enough guilt already; we do it to ourselves, every day, with every choice we make. We don’t need the judgement from other people, too.
So, in the great words of Linz DeFranco, I say to all working mothers: “Keep doing you. Fuck everyone else.”
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Top Comments
"All mothers feel enough guilt already; we do it to ourselves, every day, with every choice we make. We don’t need the judgement from other people, too."
Maybe that's where you're going wrong? If you constantly judge yourself negatively, and wear it almost as a badge of honour, it is not too hard to see how that transfers to being judgemental of others, too. Perhaps the first step towards positive change is to quit judging yourself so harshly?