Ahh travel. In our minds, it's all sandy beaches and licking at a cold gelato along the Seine. In reality, it's sweaty airports, missing luggage and that one person in your hostel coughing up a lung. 

So how can we make the experience of travelling that little bit more…romantic? 

Well, that would be by following Mamamia's Modern Australian Etiquette Guide, a series we're doing outlining all the ways that you (and your fellow humans) can not be the actual worst.

Today we're talking about travel, a time when people's inner freak really does show. 

Is it rude to recline your seat? What do you say when someone in your group wants to go to their 1,498th church and you've just had enough? 

Here, we're going to walk you through all the best ways to approach travel, from the plane, to the cruise ship, to the hotel, to the theme park. 

There really is nothing like confirming that you are indeed a decent human being in society. Here we go!

You can absolutely recline your seat on a plane… sometimes. 

I grew up in a family of non-recliners and honestly it made me hate people who recline their seats on planes. For years I held the torch for non-recliners until I realised that if I, too, reclined my seat, I, too, would be comfortable. 

There are some caveats here. 

Only recline your seat for long-haul flights where you need to get some shut-eye, and ideally only when you are actually getting that shut-eye. Give your neighbours a little more space when you can.

Also, if you're the row before the back row (who can't recline), consider only reclining a little, not to full tilt. Also, don't hop in and recline immediately (with gusto). Consider any tall people with knees who may be behind you. Always bring your chair out of reclining position during meal times.

Note: also keep your feet where they're meant to go…on the floor. 

No putting your feet in weird places, plz. Image: Getty.

Book the seat you intend to sit in. 

There are a lot of people who are booking the aisle and window seats hoping that no one will book the middle and they'll get a row for themselves. It might work, but if someone ends up sitting in that middle chair, don't ask them to move. 

There's nothing more horrible than being pressured to sit in a chair you didn't book.

Don't put your bare feet between the seats… or anywhere really.

I don't really need to explain this one, do I? Keep your socks on at a bare minimum.

Arrive at the airport clean. 

I thought this one was obvious, but I've seen people arrive at the airport in all manner of gear: last night's beach party face paint and even semi-wet cossies. 

Even if you've had a big one the night before, a plane is a cramped location and you want to make sure you are clean, with your hair brushed, and smelling fresh. 

Not to mention that you're much more likely to get upgraded if you look put together, so adding effort into your outfit can also be a win for you. 

There are so many comfortable but put together outfit options for long-haul flights. Get some inspiration here. 

No loud yapping on planes. 

You might be with your besties but it's no fun settling in for a quiet long-haul with your book, only to be accosted by raunchy stories from four men on a lad's holiday to Bali. 

Keep your voice in lowered tones and keep the tenor of the conversation polite. You never know who could be sitting around you, including children. 

Note: don't do this either. 

If you want to get to know your seat mate, tread very carefully. 

It's polite to give your seat mate a little nod and a hello when you enter the plane. However, if you want to go further than this on the conversation front, tread very carefully. 

Look for the smallest sign that person does not want to talk to you and follow it. Are they chatting with one AirPod in and reaching to open their book? They don't want to talk. Are they nodding but not really giving anything back? They don't want to talk. 

If things seem to be going well and they're happy to talk, you can even hit them with a, 'just give me the word if you want some quiet time' to ensure they feel safe to tell you, kindly, to f**k off. As a self-confessed people pleaser, I cannot tell you how many inane conversations I've been trapped in on planes. 

And as a final note, do not hit on your conversation partner until disembarking. That way it's easy for them to escape if they're not vibing it. 

Give your 'hotel friends' space. 

Have you met this amazing couple at the hotel bar and spotted them around the villa multiple times since then? Maybe you're on a cruise and keep attending the same shows? 

Well, they might be your 'hotel friends' but they still want their own space. 

Feel free to invite them to dinner with you, but always caveat it's totally fine if they want some private time. Many groups or couples travel together because they're close friends, and they might be nice, but they don't always want to make more close friends. 

Grab people's social media, but don't be offended if they unfollow you. 

It's perfectly fine to grab the social media details of the friends you meet on holiday so you can keep in touch with them, but it really is a 'no rules' relationship. It's possible you'll never see each other again so keep your expectations low on the kind of contact you will have after your trip. 

I've met so many lifelong friends on holidays, so it definitely does happen, but it really sucks when you've finally got rid of a stage-five clinger on a group trip and then they're still stalking you on social media even after it's over. 

Keep your sh*t to yourself. 

Some people are naturally messy, but when you travel try to ensure your stuff takes up the smallest footprint it can. 

Don't spread your belongings from one end of the plane to the other.

Everyone else has their own stuff they need to look after and they want a neat environment, so with kindness, keep your sh*t to yourself. 

Listen to The Quicky discuss what will get you kicked off a plane. Post continues below. 

If you feel unwell, don't be a hero. 

There's few things worse than someone who is sick on the back of the bus. If you're feeling unwell or motion sick, let the driver know so that you can sit up the front and they can stop for you to be ill, rather than everyone having to sit in a pool of your vomit. 

The same goes if you've got a cold. If you have a chesty cough, sit where there is good ventilation, ideally away from your fellow travellers and wearing a mask, rather than packed in like sardines with the back-seat bandits. Even if you feel awkward about making your condition public, your fellow travellers will thank you.

Learn the basics of the language. 

It's a bad start to go to a country without a basic understanding of how to say hello, please, thank you, sorry and goodbye. These five phrases can get you a long way, but I would also suggest learning 'Can I please have', 'where is the toilet', and 'the bill please'. 

It will make the people you're talking to so much more likely to help you, given you've made the effort to speak to them in the language they do.

Just look around, I beg you. 

We've all been next to a person in a crowd that lacks all spatial awareness.  

There's nothing worse than being the clueless slow walker on a popular running track. There's also nothing worse than photobombing someone else because you're too impatient to wait your turn.

If all travellers practised the art of paying attention, travelling might just be that little bit less chaotic. 

Behave like a guest in public areas. 

While you are travelling on your holiday, you are not in your home. Good travel etiquette involves treating public spaces like you're a guest. Take your rubbish with you, don't leave a mess, and don't manspread across two seats when you could give that to someone else. 

Be polite and say please and thank you, and for goodness sake don't leave your dirty towels lying every which way at the pool.

Watch this video about the world's most expensive plane ticket. Post continues below. 

The 'clothes pile of shame' is only for your own bedroom.  

You might have "the chair" at home where you chuck everything you've tried on or all the slightly dirty things you can probably get away with wearing again, but in a hotel room it's time to keep things orderly.

If you're staying somewhere for more than three days it will make the world of difference to actually unpack your stuff. 

Not only will this make it way easier to see all the cute outfits you brought, it will also make your room feel more like home. It's also way less unsightly if you have a guest because they won't have to look at the pile of chaos that is your open suitcase.

Respect the culture of the place you're travelling.

This goes without saying, but wherever you go, research the local customs and culture. Being ignorant is no excuse. Remember to cover up in religious places, and if there are food and alcohol guidelines in the country you're in, follow them. 

Finally, if the country you're in has a tipping culture, follow it. Even though Australians aren't used to tipping, do as the people in the country you're in do. You'll also get a much more authentic experience of what it's really like to live there. 

Bring your own sh*t. 

This mostly applies to if you're on a group holiday, but don't expect everyone else to max out their allotted suitcase allowance on stuff you intend to use. If you need a hair straightener, bring it. And for the love of god don't expect your travel mate (or a random stranger for that matter) to provide a phone charger for you. 

Have a plan, but maintain your flexibility. 

This also largely applies to group trips. We all have those bucket list experiences on holiday that we want to do. Maybe it's seeing the Mona Lisa, or going to a New York Nicks game. Bake that into your trip itinerary to make sure your bucket list items are ticked off.

However, on the day-to-day for travelling, you need to have some flexibility. No tantrum throwing if you didn't get to go to that umpteeth, obscure Catholic Church in Italy, or that god-awful hike on a 40-degree day. If you really want to do it, be prepared to go alone, otherwise, compromise for the greater good of the group. 

If you get the most food, pick up the bill. 

Don't make the person ordering the least whip their card out. Image: Mamamia.

Everyone has different budgets when they travel, and it's important to be aware of these. If you suggest a fancy restaurant or eat the majority of the food, either split the bill by what you ate as you pay, or pick up the bill on your card and split it later.

Your poor friend who has begrudgingly agreed to part with their cash and ordered the cheapest thing on the menu will thank you.

Apps like Beem It and Splitwise are great for avoiding these sorts of money dilemmas when on holiday. 

Sort your life out before lining up for airport security. 

It truly is infuriating when you're behind someone in airport security that cannot for the life of them figure out that they need to take off their belt and put their laptop in a separate tray. 

Usually the security guards are literally reciting what you need to do, but half the time these travellers have their AirPods in their ears and oblivion in their eyes. 

If you know you have a tricky bag to get through security, stop before the line and get yourself organised before holding everyone up. 

Don't be afraid to ask air hostesses for basic needs, but be respectful. 

I'm one of those people who tries to be no hassle, almost to a fault. I spent years taking planes and ending up low-key constipated and hungry by the end of it because I'd drunk no water and asked for no snacks. 

The air hostesses are there to help you, so don't be afraid to ask them to top up your water bottle or if there are any snacks available. However, do this sparingly.

Stop comparing everything to where you live.

There is no way to kill the mood quite like walking across a beautiful Grecian beach only for someone to go, 'Well, it's no Bondi'. 

The reason that you travel is to see the world, experience the beauty of different places and different cultures, so stop comparing everywhere you go to where you live. 

No baggsing pool chairs. 

I can't believe I even need to write this, but as someone who was accosted by an American family who thought I stole their free, hotel-provided towels in Fiji, I fear that I do. 

There is no baggsing sun loungers. Do not get up at 6am when they open, pop your towel on a lounge and then go about your day while other people lie on the floor. It's inordinately rude and implies that you think you're more important than anyone else. 

Secondly, if you did bags a chair and notice that hotel staff have removed it, do not blame the unsuspecting person who saw an empty lounger and lay on it. Not that I'm still hurt by that experience, or anything…

This woman is openly flouting the rules. Image: Getty.

Lay on a freaking towel.

While you might go around lying nearly butt naked on any surface you please, other people would love it if you did use a barrier between your skin and the public sun lounger! 

When on the sun lounger, lie your towel down on the bed and then lie on that for the ultimate in pool hygiene and classiness. 

Purchase extra luggage before you get to the gate.

I've been caught out by this one before, and honestly, it sucked having to pay $70 for an extra three kilos of hand luggage at the gate. 

But that was back in 2012 and over 10 years on, we all know that you need to keep your hand luggage at the right weight. Taking it out on the poor airport worker who pulls you up on it or feigning that you didn't know the rules just won't cut it anymore. 

On a recent trip to Byron I ended up booking an extra 15 kilograms of luggage weight for the way home, and it only cost me $30 because I bought it in advance. So, just bite the bullet now to avoid the awkwardness at the gate. 

Have a heart for the poor middle-seater.

We can all agree that the burning pit of hell on a plane is the middle seat, especially if you have two men manspreading on either side of you. 

They get to have the two middle armrests, no ifs or buts about it.

Karma is your boyfriend.

The final etiquette point when travelling is that what goes around comes around. If you are constantly demanding everything from everyone on your travels and expecting to be treated like a Queen, things probably won't go well for you. 

In my experience, people are more inclined to do things for you when you are kind to them, offer your compassion and make requests politely and humbly. 

This final point will get you way further (including upgrades) rather than being a demanding so-and-so. 

And there you have it, all the ways to travel without being a low-key ar**hole. You're welcome. 

Feature image: Instagram/majamalnar/Getty.