What you don't know about porn (NSFW)

BY MIA FREEDMAN

The first time I heard someone say “anal is the new oral”, I blanched. Cringed. Winced a bit.

The idea that anal sex had somehow become as common as oral sex, as much an assumed part of every woman’s sexual repetoire was a shock to my Gen X system.

Because until recently, anal sex used to be very much a sub-category of sex. A side dish. Not the main course. Not to everyone’s taste.

When I was in women’s magazines we would run a story on it every year but it was never mainstream.

A few years ago I noticed this seemed to be changing and at first, I didn’t understand why. Had women’s sexual tastes suddenly changed? But why?

I soon realised the difference was porn. In the past few years, porn has become very main stream and anal sex has become very mainstream in porn. Standard even.

But  – again I ask – why? Have you wondered that? Wondered where all the vaginas have gone? Wondered why porn is and why every woman in every porn video seems to be positively delighted by the situation?

I never understood until last night while I was watching TV. ABC1 no less. You really do learn so much during Q&A and last night was particularly enlightening.

Because FINALLY, I learned why bums have replaced vaginas in modern porn.

In a discussion about this by a brilliant panel including Benjamin Law and Germaine Greer, it was explained succintly.

Craig Gross is an American pastor (affectionately known as the Porn Pastor which sounds a lot like Prawn Pasta when you hear someone say it quickly) who founded the website XXXchurch.com in an effort to help both those who are addicted to porn and those who make a living in the porn industry.

He explained that in the porn industry, porn actresses are paid $1500 for anal sex and $750 for vaginal.

So. Which would you do if you were a porn actress trying to earn a living by doing as few scenes as possible?

Yep. Anal simply pays better. Men want to see it and women want to earn more money so they can feed their kids and pay their rent. It’s simple economics.

But they don’t explain this transaction when you see the porn, not even in the fine print. Because there isn’t any print. Now there isn’t even a DVD box with any writing. It’s all online.

So who explains this to all the people who are watching all the anal scenes in all the porn and thinking it’s the new ‘normal’? Thinking that’s what all women want and that’s how all women want it.

If you’re into it and it’s safe and consensual, go for your life. But the truth is that most women are not into it (or many of the other things you see in standard porn) and yet virtually every bit of man-made porn suggests that we ALL ARE.

So next time the subject of porn comes up – hell, bring it up! – spread the word. Female porn stars are simply paid more to have anal sex – or do double penetration – on camera.

They don’t do it because they love it. They don’t do it because that’s what most women want. They do it because they need the money.

And how messed up is that.

As another Q&A panellist, Christa Hughes, suggested last night: “We need to put the pussy back in porn!”

Yep. Bring back the vagina. Amen to that.