After approximately four months of tossing and turning at night, getting precisely zero sleep, we can finally take a long-deserved nap: We know exactly how the Jordyn Woods and Tristan Thompson cheating scandal went down thanks to a totally non-scripted and non-bias episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
Thank goodness, we were getting tired.
The episode we waited all season for finally aired this week and we’re here to debrief.
During the first episode of a two-part (oh, of course) season finale of KUWTK, we saw when Khloe, 34, discovered her basketballer baby daddy had cheated on her with sister Kylie Jenner’s best friend, Jordyn Woods.
For those unfamiliar with the family dynamics, let us explain with a simple diagram:
In short, Jordyn was more embedded in the Kardashian machine than actual-Kardashian Rob.
When the news broke in February, fans could hardly believe it. Jordyn was Kylie's best friend: Kylie supported her financially, and she'd also been part of Kylie and Khloe's businesses. Yikes.
Many of the family struggled to believe it too, as Kim explained in the episode.
"I think at first nobody even believed it was real, they were just like super confused," she said.
"We were all just kind of watching it all unfold. Jordyn was someone that Khloe really trusted and believed in and supported and employed. This is just so crazy."
As we saw, it all started when Kim received a phone call while she was getting ready for her reality TV interviews. Very handy timing.
"My friend Larsa called me to explain that a reporter that she knows was about to write a story that Jordyn and Tristan were at his home, late nighter until seven in the morning, they said they were like making out, I immediately didn't believe it, I was like this can't be true."
She then obviously called Khloe who was weirdly calm about the whole thing (that didn't last).
Oh, and it turned into the craziest four-way call we've ever heard, with Kim, Khloe, Kourtney and Kylie all expressing their outrage.
"So I spoke to Jordyn," Khloe told her sisters. "She was in between his legs, she said, 'I can’t remember if we kissed'.
"It was weird that she didn't text me at all that evening because every single time in the past, if Jordyn would ever see Tristan, she would text me.
"So Jordyn called me and said, 'I was your watchdog last night, I was there to protect me and keep an eye out - that's why she stayed as late as she did.
"She’s blaming him - she’s like, 'I was so naive'."
Khloe said Jordyn told her her loyalty was always towards Khloe, which makes... zero sense.
"My heart is in my eyeballs," Khloe said and Kylie agreed that was exactly how she felt as well. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
By this point there was still one Kardashian/Jenner sister left to tell, and Kendall sure delivered.
"Oh my f**king god, is this real?" she screamed down the phone. "Jordyn? JORDYN?! She's the last person on the planet that I would have said would've done this."
We then heard how Kylie reacted when she found out her best friend ~betrayed the family~ after months of remaining quiet (On Kris' order, because TV $ are a'comin').
The family were sitting around a table, probably because that was easier for producers than trying to piece together what the heck was going on from that complicated group phone call.
"I called her and she didn’t really say anything. She was just like, you know crying the whole time," Kylie told her sisters.
"And I was just telling her, 'I'm like scared of you now. Like, you’re capable of waking up the next morning with a smile on your face'.
"I pretty much told her exactly what we’ve been talking about. Like, 'you weren’t thinking about True, not Khloe, not me. But you weren’t thinking about yourself like, look what you did. You could do whatever, but when it affects my family, me, then that’s when it’s a problem'."
Khloe said she was upset because she "knew who [Tristan] was," but she "never in a million years thought that’s who [Jordyn] was."
Then Kim stepped in: "The tone of not ever saying sorry," she began, condemning how Jordyn dealt with the situation.
"Like, I would’ve been on Khloe’s doorstep bawling my eyes out being like, ‘f**k, I don’t know what the f**k I was doing. Holy s**t, I’m a f***ing idiot’."
Khloe was obviously upset, but she continued to remain calm as the family discussed the drama... at first anyway.
But remember how we mentioned this was a two-part finale? Yeah, well, the explosive trailer for next week's part two shows Khloe... less... calm.
In promos for next week, we see her reaction to Jordyn's 'tell-all' interview with Jada Pinkett Smith's Red Table Talk.
"LIAR!" she yells at her phone.
"My family was ruined!" she can be heard screaming in the promo. "F**k these h**s! These f**king b**ches think they can f**k our men!"
Oh.
Until next week.