Rachel used Facebook to track down her dad. Now she wants your advice before she takes the final step…
Rachel McGregor has never known her father. Born in Nepean Hospital in Sydney’s west in 1986, she knew she’d been adopted out by her birth mother Lisa Peachy, aged just 18.
Now just 27, Rachel finally wants to know who she is and where she came from. She turned to the internet for help.
She posted this status update on her Facebook page, asking friends to share it:
I’m unsure of how to caption this, to even put it out there is scary as hell, so a brief mind vomit and I’m on my way…If you can take a moment to share this image it would mean a lot to me.
For as much as I am grown now and many things can’t be improved or changed a little bit of knowledge would go a long way. To look at another human and see where pieces of myself came from or to know my family’s medical history for the sake of my son would bring a contentment that’s otherwise escaped me. Thank you for looking, sharing and hopefully answering a few things on the way… Xx
Hi. I’m Rachel + I’m trying to find my father. I was born on the 17th of June 1986 at Nepean Hospital to LISA PEACHY aged 18. She lived at Brown Street in Penrith, attended Penrith South and Penrith High, NSW, 2750. I was adopted out and there is no info on my birth cert so please share this to help me get some answers. xx<
The post was share almost 15,000 times and received almost 200 comments. It’s now been almost two weeks and Rachel has received several pieces of information regarding her birth father, several of which point to the same man.
Now she just has to build up the courage to contact him.
We reached out to Rachel to talk about her quest to find her birth father and were so touched by her honesty and bravery. We asked her why she decided to try and find her dad after all these years. “I had always wondered where I can from,” she said. “Parts of me I couldn’t assimilate to my maternal heritage or people around me. My build, my love of certain cars. I’ve struggled with my identity, my worth and my family for as long as I can remember and it was enough.”
She says it was an episode of popular TV show friends that finally spurred her into action. “It’s all been bubbling to the surface and I was watching a friend tattoo and FRIENDS was in the background. The episode included Phoebe meeting her dad and I just thought ‘Why am I waiting? What have I got to lose?’ I got up, wrote the details, took the picture then paused… I didn’t know what to write, how to package what I was doing, I started to back out then I just hit post. Once it was done I just had to leave it for a few hours, I was tempted to delete it. I was scared, ashamed, embarrassed and honestly not one bit hopeful. I just had to put it out though.”
Rachel has always known she is adopted and was in touch with her birth mother from a young age. She asked her who her father was and was given a name, but wasn’t sure if she could trust the information. That’s when she was 14. It was New Year’s Eve and her birth mother was heavily intoxicated but she she decided to look for him anyway. She started asking around and heard his family owned a mechanical workshop. Young Rachel located the workshop and sat outside for hours but didn’t have the courage to go in. “I returned a few months later and it had closed down.”
Then, when Rachel was 15, she was sitting on her front doorstep and for the first time, picked up the local paper and turned to the obituaries. She saw the name her mother had given her and realised it must been her biological grandfather who had just passed away. “I contemplated going to the funeral. I knew I could hide away and see my whole family in one go. The day came, life and fear got in the way and I didn’t go.”
She tried one last time to find her father. She Googled his name and found he’d opened a new automotive business. She called but it was too late. Once again the business was gone.
Then time got away from her. Rachel moved away, got married and had a child. She was so focused on raising her son that she ignored her own issues. However they soon caught up with her, prompting her to post the Facebook status.
Now she has a name, a photo and an address. All she has to do is contact him but she's feeling reluctant. "I'm scared. Plain and simple. I rather walk through the fear though than spend the rest of my life wondering."
Rachel says she's trying not to get her hopes up and plans to ask for a DNA test to confirm the man is indeed her biological father. "If I can have that, then if its certain maybe just one meal. A chance to hear what happened, why and then its up to the universe."
What advice would you give Rachel about reaching out to her father?