rogue

'My neighbour told me the name of her husband's first love. I knew I'd have to lie to my kid forever.'

Michelle* is facing a major moral conundrum right now. 

Recently, she was outside socialising with her neighbour, Anna*, who lives next door with her husband Jarrad*.

The women were sitting down and talking about their relationships, specifically their sex lives and intimacy. Anna then shared that her husband Jarrad was "her first everything" in terms of dating and sex

"I took the opportunity and asked her if she was his first too. She said no. She said that he had an ex who was his high school sweetheart before he moved to Anna's home state," Michelle explained in a Reddit post.

Watch: MM Confessions: My partner doesn't know. Post continues below.

Anna went on to explain that Jarrad had grown up in the neighbourhood that they all now reside, but had moved state for work where he first met and started his relationship with her. 

They stayed there for a six years before relocating back to where he grew up.

It immediately piqued Michelle's interests, as she knew someone who was born to young lovers in this area in the same time frame. Her own adopted son.

"I asked her if he ever told her the name of his ex. She looked at me and said that he had her initials tattooed on his arm but got it removed when they got married. She said that her initials were 'L.R.'"

Michelle's blood ran cold.

Those initials, plus the timelines and close locations, sounded awfully familiar.

Jarrad was in high school with his first love at the time that Michelle's son was born. His birth mother's initials were also 'L.R.' It seemed like a cruel twist of fate.

Could it be true that her male neighbour is her son's biological dad?

"I asked Anna if she knew [her husband's ex-girlfriend's] full name. She said that he doesn't like talking about her since his breakup wasn't the best. I can't lie to myself and say that it's a coincidence but maybe just maybe it was a coincidence. At least I hope so," Michelle wrote, asking for advice from Reddit users about whether she should ask Jarrad whether he fathered a child in his late teen years.

"I don't think I will ever tell the truth. I know this makes me a bad person but I can't give him my son. What if he wants to take him away? 

"I feel so bad right now. I will just keep this to myself until I die. I know that the comments will tell me I am a horrible person — and I won't lie, I am — but it's better if they both didn't know that he exists."

Is Michelle's life a movie plot? It feels that way, she notes. Especially considering she is expecting a child at the moment, and is heavily pregnant.

"Everything is just falling on my head."

The commenters typed away advice in a flurry.

You need to get a lawyer, cover your bases, and find out for sure.

I'm not saying you are a bad person, I can't imagine how you feel. But you are choosing to do this because it's the easiest and best solution for you. But is it the best for your kid? And are you prepared to deal with the consequences of him not liking your choice?

There are thousands, maybe millions of people. It is VERY likely this is just a massive coincidence. 

All adopted kids eventually find their answers, sooner or later. However, for now it is what it is. He wasn't ready for a child and you wanted to make a difference. You both made this a choice. 

Forget the alleged father — it will be traumatising to your kid if he discovers that you were living next to his bio dad and kept it a secret.

Ultimately, Michelle thinks she has found the biological father of her child.

But will she tell another soul? The signs suggest that she won't anytime soon.

What do you think Michelle should do in this situation? Feel free to comment below. 

The names related to this Reddit post have been changed for privacy reasons. 

Feature Image: Canva.

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Top Comments

alexharley22 2 months ago
I know of someone who is adopted, the family have always been open about it. A few years ago this person was going through some big life changes and decided that they were ready to reach out to their birth mother. Sadly the birth mother had decided to never share with her husband and children that she had given a child up for adoption. So when this person reached out to the birth mother, the birth mother wasn't exactly warm and welcoming and maintained that she wanted to keep her secret. This has had an impact on the person who had been given up for adoption and had ramifications on their relationships and other aspects of their life. Honesty is always best for everyone involved, secrets have a way of coming out and creating lots of problems that could have been avoided. 

keen teacher 2 months ago
She has already told countless souls on Reddit. How will her son feel if he ever sees it on Redfit and puts 2 and 2 together?
rush 2 months ago 1 upvotes
@keen teacher a lot of the stories on Reddit are made up anyway, so there's a pretty good chance this son is entirely fictional.