Supermodel Emily Ratajkowski posted a selfie on Instagram that sent people into a frenzy.
In it, she's wearing two diamond rings accompanied by the words "divorce rings" showcasing the fact that she altered her original engagement ring into two separate rings.
The comments on her post ranged from people supporting her decision to people claiming that it shouldn't be something to be proud of.
Screenshot via: Instagram
Screenshot via: Instagram.
Ratajkowski's post made me think about what women do with their rings once they're divorced... Do they keep them? Continue to wear them? Return them? Sell them?
This is exactly why we asked women to share their stories — and their responses are JUICY. Here's what they said:
"I loved my engagement ring. I helped to choose it and it's really 'me.' I wanted to continue to wear it, so I had it altered. I had the diamond removed and turned into a necklace, and replaced the diamond with a citrine. Now it looks more like a cocktail ring. I wear both items most days."
Watch: Engagement ring trends through the decade. Post continues below.
"I gave them to my mum so she could turn them into something new or sell them, whatever she wanted. I didn’t want them in my house, it felt like bad juju!"
"For my first engagement ring, I pawned it to pay the bills I got left with. For the second one, I gave it to my daughter from that marriage."
"My ex (not happy that I was leaving him) kept them. I have gone to ask for them back as I would love to get them melted into a different design but am too scared to ask as we try and keep an amicable relationship for the kids. If he had any decency, he would have given them back."
"I returned both rings to my ex-partner after his mother sent me several abusive messages asking for them back. They weren’t a family heirloom or anything, they were purchased from our joint savings, she was just very bitter about the separation! I wanted a clean break and was happy to walk away with nothing…"
"I tried to give all the jewellery back, but he refused to take it so I sold it to a gold place, donated the diamonds to a charity that supports ovarian cancer and used the gold money to fund flights for a holiday."
"I sold my engagement ring as I needed the money! Also, I’d always hated the design and didn’t want to keep something that reminded me of the place my marriage became. I threw my wedding ring in the sea! Nobody needs that energy in their lives."
"I gave them to my daughter (my ex was her father). I told her that she could choose what she wanted to do with them, sell them, keep them or remodel them. I explained he had given them to me with love and that love was the place she was born into."
"I turned my engagement, wedding and eternity rings into a beautiful ring I designed and gave myself for my 40th birthday. I wear it on my right ring finger all the time. For me, it symbolises all the good things about my marriage (the two beautiful children born from it), and also the strong, independent person I now am.
I intend to pass it down to my daughters and I know they like that I still wear the diamonds their Daddy once gave me.
I also still have his wedding ring, it sits in my jewellery box where it's been for five years. He doesn't want it, so I'll keep it until the girls can decide if they want it."
"For a couple of years, I left my rings in a drawer wanting nothing to do with them. But as time passed, I began to see them as evidence of my resilience and the hard work I put into redefining myself as the sole proprietor of my life.
So, I took my rings to a jeweller and we designed a big, chunky, diamond ring together. I wore it for over a decade.
Recently, I redesigned that ring again. This time, it became a delicate ring with several other coloured precious stones in all the colours of my wardrobe. I wear it every day and will probably redesign it again one day."
"Engaged, not married... I gave it back to him but he asked me it keep it. The diamonds were from his mum’s engagement ring so very meaningful—but the ring sits in my jewellery box. I can’t wear it now because I’m married to someone else who wouldn’t appreciate me wearing it (there is no love or friendship remaining with my ex). It feels disrespectful to sell it or transform it into another piece of jewellery. I do think of it as an insurance policy in case I get stuck and need some money in an emergency, I could sell it."
"I've kept mine to wear when I go solo travelling... I can make up a pretend husband if I feel I need to for safety reasons... E.g. ' Oh yeah, I'm with my husband, he's just in that shop over there...' I'm still friends with my ex so they don't bring up too many bad memories for me."
"I have kept them but I have no idea why or what I’m going to do with them. I have daughters so I thought they might want to see them at some point and maybe have them. I loved wearing them so much and it was sad to not be able to wear them anymore after the divorce."
"I put them together, along with my wedding photos and other treasures from the early, happy days of my marriage. When my kids sort through all my stuff when I’m gone, I want them to know that their mother and father were once very happy, very much in love and very committed to our kids. I’m heartbroken that my ex-husband destroyed our marriage with another woman, but for 25 years it was good. Destroying the symbols of that goodness felt wrong."
"I took them to cash converters. I got barely anything for them (we had been married very young so they weren't very valuable) and then went and spent the money on a fancy meal. It felt weird but also good in that I didn't have to be reminded every time I saw them of the fact we were no longer together, the wedding, the proposal, etc. It was a positive step in getting over it all."
"I was never married but after my partner ended our engagement, I did a dodgy and pretended to our insurer that I lost my engagement ring and subsequently got paid out. Then I sold the ring and used all the money to fund a trip overseas. Cheeky, but I would do it again in a heartbeat."
"I’ve still got mine sitting in a box in a cupboard seven years after separating. I keep thinking I should just sell it but that seems difficult to do. It’s hard to part with (I really loved wearing it) and yet I can’t wear it. I considered having it altered into something else but can’t bear to do that to it since it’s a gorgeous filigreed antique. So it sits there…"
"I divorced my husband when my daughter was 11. I gave her my engagement ring when she turned 18 and allowed her to do what she wanted with it. She still regularly wears it and loves it. With my wedding band, I still have it and I'm thinking of selling it to a gold broker along with a bunch of additional unworn items. Out with the old, in with the new."
"Kept them. When the divorce was done a couple of years later I had a pendant designed and melted the 2 rings down to make it. I wear it regularly and see it as a reminder of my big life decision - the right decision."
"I kept all my jewellery as part of the divorce, my ex could have kept his ring if he hadn’t lost it. I also paid for some of the cost of it as I paid off his car and credit card loans."
"I used to love my ring but it's meaningless now. It's a massive diamond I could repurpose but I would still think of it when I look at it. So, I plan on selling both the engagement and wedding band and going on a holiday with the money — that will be happiness and memories that actually do last a lifetime."
"I still have them — five years on and no idea what to do with them! It’s the only yellow gold I own (not a metal I ever wear). I’d probably sell them but I have no idea how to go about it and somehow feel it’s a bit wrong."
"I had them melted down & had them made into one diamond ring that I love. I had it made to fit my middle finger so I can flip him the bird with the beautiful ring when I think of him!"
"I tried to take them to a Cash Converters and they offered me about $110 for them. So, I decided to give the smaller diamonds to a jeweller and had the larger diamond made into a pendant. I still feel weird wearing it, so I don't do it often. I might need to have it remade but it's very expensive right now to have jewellery changed!"
"They are still sitting in a box in my drawer five years after separating and three years after divorcing. It feels like the effort (mental load plus actual time) to sell them isn’t worth the return from my very quick googling efforts. I can’t bring myself to throw them away either as it seems like such a waste.
It’s crazy how much we all spend on rings that are valued at thousands or more until you want to sell them and then they are worth a small percentage of that."
"I kept them. I have them in a drawer (and all the jewellery my ex gave plus he left his ring on the bench) and will give them to my kids to melt down to make something for their person when they commit. Might be rings or something else."
"I carried them around in a pocket of my handbag for a few months intending to sell them to be melted down, then forgot about them and lost them!"
"I had the stone reset into a new ring. Selling diamonds second-hand only gets you about 20 per cent of what you paid and I loved my stone!"
"Kept them. My dad’s wedding ring (it no longer fit him) and a few of my dress rings were melted down to make my engagement/ wedding rings. I loved them and still do. They were given with love (at the time), so will pass them on to my daughters."
"My current partner's ex-wife refuses to include rings in their property settlement. They are a significant asset, so I don’t see why they shouldn’t be treated as such. She believes they were a gift."
"We kept our respective rings. I have considered making something else with the diamonds but so far I have not done anything."
"I kept them. They are in my jewellery box. I could sell one of them if I wanted, however the other is very personalised so it would probably need to be made into something else. But for right now, they are there and I'm ignoring them."
"Not divorced but engaged at 18, which turns out is almost always a big mistake. When the engagement broke off about two months before the wedding, I was far too naïve and thought I was preserving a friendship by giving the ring back because I assumed it ended amicably.
As soon as I gave the ring back I found out some information that ignited my petty side and now almost seven years later, I still regret it. I have spent so much time down a rabbit hole on this and from my research it's legally a gift that the recipient is entitled to keep."
"I kept them and planned to give them to my daughter after she turned 18. Turns out, the week she turned 18, our house was broken into and they were stolen. Funny that they sat in that jewellery box for 15 years. I should preface all of that with we were very young, and they were worth nothing but I guess she could have turned them into something else."
"My ex asked for the engagement ring back because he was angry that I filed for divorce (after he’d been cheating) so I said 'no worries' and posted the wedding ring too. I couldn’t have cared less about the rings. They were tainted as far as I was concerned."
If you want more culture content from Emily Vernem, you can follow her on Instagram @emilyvernem.
Feature image: Canva.
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