Gen Y, I hope your hand is up. According to a Family Planning NSW survey of women aged 16-25, 50 percent of Gen Y women say they’ve sometimes been pressured to give oral sex. And many say that young men ‘expect’ to receive it.
Sexual pressure is a terrible thing, no question. Should be stopped. But did Gen Y guys invent it? Haven’t men of all ages always wanted oral sex?
Other stand-out revelations from the survey:
– Young women were overwhelmingly positive about oral sex – 82 per cent said they found it ”enjoyable and rewarding”.
– The most common reason for having oral sex, according to the survey was: ”It feels good.”
– A quarter of those surveyed saw oral sex as a less intimate alternative to penetrative sex, for which they said ”they weren’t ready”.
– A further 14 per cent considered oral sex safer than other forms of sex, because there was no risk of pregnancy and less risk of picking up a sexually transmitted disease. [WRONG!!!!!!!! You CAN pick up an STI]
According to a report in The Age:
The survey reinforced the findings of the latest national survey of secondary students by La Trobe University’s Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and Society. In 2008, 57 per cent of students said they’d had oral sex by the time they were in year 12.
A 2008 Senate inquiry into the sexualisation of children rejected calls to classify Girlfriend and Dolly as suitable for those 15 and older. ”It’s a big part of why teen magazines exist,” said Girlfriend magazine’s editor Sarah Cornish. ”To answer these questions.”
I’ve never had a problem with teen magazines talking about oral sex. Education and knowledge is everything. Doesn’t mean you’re going to do it, just that you want to gather information about it – especially true for girls who like to know what they’re talking about long before they act. And when I worked at Dolly, I saw many studies confirming that those girls best able to resist peer or partner pressure to be more sexually active are those who know their stuff. So when he whimpers ‘blue balls’, she can knowledgeably reply ‘well, go sort yourself out then, it’s not my job’.
I’m interested in the stats around pressure, though. To re-cap: 50 % of Gen Y women say they’ve sometimes been pressured to give oral sex.
Do you think this is a new thing? Was it different when you were a teenager? Have you ever been pressured into doing something sexually you didn’t want to? What would your advice be to someone who was?
Top Comments
I think if you are being pressured into giving oral sex, you are sleeping with the wrong kind of men! I'm Gen Y & have never been with someone who tried to "push my head down" (seriously?! what kind of men are you sleeping with?!) or made me feel any pressure to perform sexual acts I wasn't comfortable with. Maybe its women not being forward enough with what they are and aren't comfortable with in the bedroom that is creating these kind of problems... My partner is a 22 male with a VERY healthy sex drive, he knows exactly what i'm happy to do and what i won't do (admittedly there isn't a whole lot I won't do) but he knows and respects it.
You can't blame men for trying if us as women aren't telling them our boundaries!
Female and gen X and I never was pressured either into sex or fellation. I don't like giving oral sex, that doesn't do a thing for me, and I couldn't care less about receiving any (I fall asleep)--I prefer penetration and other practices.
I do have grown aware though (I'm in a profession where I get to talk a lot with young people and teenagers about such things) that there is a lot of pressure these days, including peer pressure.
I don't think it was as bad formerly either. For one thing you simply didn't get as bombarded with sexual content as you do today, there was no internet and to watch a porn flick you had to go into an icky cinema peopled with wanking males (which as a girl you simply didn't). The further back in time you go the lesser public mention of sex there is, and after that you get really fast to a period where oral sex was already considered pretty sinful.
So yes, I believe the younger people are the more there is pressure, and that is unacceptable. I've talked to many girls who hate what they have to do to satisfy their boyfriends, and to young women who've had men dump them like hot potatos on hearing they won't go down on them.
To me that is the exact opposite of a healthy, natural approach to sex.