A woman is hitting a man on the street. So why is everyone laughing?

Trigger Warning: This post deals with issues of domestic violence and may be triggering for survivors of abuse.

This video is shocking, but perhaps not surprising.

It shows two examples of intimate partner violence, being carried out in broad daylight.

In the first example, a man is shown abusing a woman. In the second example, a woman is shown abusing a man.

There’s a startling difference in the reactions from members of the public.

Perhaps what is most troubling about this video, is the laughing and smirking from bystanders as they watch a woman abusing a man.

It is deeply depressing that we live in a world where domestic violence is so shockingly common. That men and women alike can suffer at the hands of their partners – who can also be men and women alike.

The ManKind initiative, who made the above video, are doing really good work in the UK. They receive over 1,500 calls from men who are in distress every year, and provide unquestioning support – a completely necessary service, when so many male survivors of domestic violence often report being faced with disbelief and even mockery when they try notifying the authorities about their abuse.

But despite the fact that ManKind are doing good work, this ad has made some people really uncomfortable. This is partly due to the dialogue that surrounds the debate about domestic violence – and how some advocates for male DV survivors, are sometimes seem to be attacking advocates for female DV survivors.

ManKind believe that “men, in particular, suffer” when they are experiencing domestic violence, due to “the lack of recognition and awareness by society and often the lack of local services available to support them”.

They continue:

The charity does not believe in the gendered approach to domestic abuse because this is not appropriate in the 21st century and is not in keeping with ensuring there is equality of support, services and recognition for all victims. The ManKind Initiative believes firmly in the need to support all victims of domestic abuse.

There are so many ideas that this video, and associated campaign, raise. ManKind clearly believe that services that provide support specifically for male survivors of domestic violence are necessary – but why is it that services that provide support for female survivors are somehow ‘not appropriate’?

Conversely, why is it that as a society we will (at least publicly) condemn violence against women – yet when a woman attacks a man in a public place, bystanders smile and laugh?

Violence against anybody is ‘not okay’ – that is not a point that needs to be debated. But does that mean that campaigns that address the unique characteristics of either violence against women, or violence against men, are also ‘not okay’?

Here’s the thing: women who have experienced domestic violence, are not the enemy of men who have experienced domestic violence. Organisations that support women are not the enemy of men.

The real enemy, are the perpetrators of violence themselves. Let’s remember that.

If you believe you may be an abusive partner, you can receive help via Relationships Australia on 1300 364 277. If you have experienced, or are at risk of domestic violence or sexual assault, you can receive help by calling 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732. If you are in immediate danger please call the police on 000.

What do you think about the various issues raised by this video? Does society devalue the violence that men experience?