By ANONYMOUS
Today my heart broke just a little bit – the tiniest little crack that I’d put aside especially for this moment.
It was the day of her first period. I knew it was coming, the writing was on the wall and maybe I even felt it just a little bit, the same way I felt her kick before she arrived.
For the last few months I had been watching and waiting – almost rejoicing as she went another month without a sign. Each time, hoping the inevitable could be delayed if I kept my fingers crossed and ignored the probability.
This month, however was different. My beautiful 11 year old was on camp when she had an inkling – and perhaps I did too, as sentimental as it sounds, I’m sure I felt ‘a’ moment.
Lying in bed that same night, missing the comfort of all the beds in the house being filled, I knew the time was near – I’d even silently diarised the next weekend to have an extra little chat.
It’s not the growing up, apart, or even the speeding pre-teen years it’s more the biting realisation of change. It’s ‘the curse’ that’s upsetting, the loss of innocence or easiness that makes my heart ache just a little bit.
The momentous occasion was news for the whole family – in recognition of the event, her dear dad was directed to have a slug of wine prior to sharing. Unlike my dad’s generation, he’s involved in all aspects of her life and it was important to make him part of this too.
He was even sent for all the paraphernalia – why not I reasoned, had he not supported me through breast pads, maternity pads and all sorts of ‘women’s issues’ that arrive post birthing three babies.
Her little shy upset at her dad knowing was quickly replaced with a little bit of pride – a touch of excitement that someone else had been informed she was officially growing up.
Next to take interest in the events of the day was her nine year old sister who was a little flummoxed by the proceedings. She quickly retreated with a grin back to her bedroom, taking comfort in her sister’s two years seniority.
And for the lady in question, she took the whole thing in her stride – the child normally so predisposed to drama was only slightly curious and overwhelmingly underwhelmed really.
So of course, I too showed all my self-restraint and basked quietly in the mum and daughter moment. We shared some questions as she quietly chartered unfamiliar territory. It was all done in the fading sunshine of an April afternoon and I know I will remember it forever.
It’s her milestone – so today I’ve just gone about my business with stolen moments for my memories of a little girl on a journey. The moment is etched in time as a new period, no pun intended, arrives in her life.
I know it’s just the beginning of the changes and as she races towards the high school years my heart will be broken a few more times in the months to come. Once again it’s just those tiny bits I’ve put aside for then. Graduations, weddings, overseas trips – the times when she becomes who she’s going to be – and of course it’s without me.
Hopefully I’ve inherited the heart of an ox – as two sisters are to follow in her footsteps, and each one holds their own special place just waiting for those chips. Their stories are yet to come but they’re sure to be as memorable in a different space in time.
Editor’s Note: Thanks to all the Mamamia readers who expressed concern that this article was originally published under the author’s name. We have spoken with the author who has agreed to amend the post so it is anonymous. We appreciate the feedback.
Do you remember your first period? Did your mum put together a momento box as you were growing up?
Top Comments
I've only read this article with the author as anonymous, and it resonated strongly. My daughter today got her period for the first time, 11 years and 10 months, and
I admit to feeling a little sad that my 'little girl' is growing up and having to face more complex challenges. It's been a private mother daughter conversation, and a situation we've discussed/prepared for in the last 12 months, but nonetheless, a milestone that has affected me more than I expects.
I feel a bit sucked in thought this was going to be an important story daughter got her period big deal. I don't mean to be nasty but really how inane. I have just spent an hour watching Insight about young children who are carers for their parents I was in tears the whole time these children had so much love for their parents. That's what made my heart break just a little.
I'm with you. I was like...sooo the thing that happens to every girl happened to your daughter? Great stuff. Bit over dramatic if you ask me.
Well, as a mother of an 11 year old who also just got her period, I too felt the same sense of loss. You are comparing apples to oranges and are forgetting the special bond that mother's and daughter's share - especially when they are going through major transitions. This is a significant period (excuse the pun) in a young girl's life and it is one that should both be mourned (i.e. the loss of their childhood) and celebrated (the transition into young adulthood). You are right; to dismiss a mother's love and concern for her daughter is, frankly, a little nasty.