When I became a parent, I really worked hard to try and stop swearing. It became apparent early on how much of a parrot kids can be, so it was important that I stopped swearing.
During the first year of parenting, what also became apparent to me was that I was slightly crazy; and had a need to express myself more than usual. So I couldn’t contain the swear words.
I have now come to terms with the fact that swearing is a part of my life; and I am okay with that. Because I look at swear words the way I do (as expressive words), it doesn’t bother me. I use the full range of curse words in front of my two-year-old and four-year-old kids — except the C-word.
I teach my children that the words I say are “adult words”, and that when they become an adult they can choose to use them or not. This was how I was raised.
Since I adopted this philosophy, my children haven’t sworn once around me.
Author, Maria Foy. Source: Supplied.
I don’t get messaged a lot, but sometimes I get someone saying “you really should stop swearing around your kids” or “stop swearing at your kids”. It doesn’t happen often, but it does happen; and for the most part I can ignore it.
However today’s comment prompted me to write this blog post; one which I am entitled to write.
I am allowed to swear. I am allowed to use words to express how I feel, no matter what words those are.
If, as a person, you are offended by my swearing then that is on YOU and not on me. I do not swear to offend people. As I stated several times, I use words to help me express myself.
If you don’t like that, then that’s fine. We all live different lives, and like/dislike different things. It would be boring if we were all the same.
However what is not cool is saying that what I am doing is WRONG. Because it is not.
CONFESSION: I have sworn at my children a couple of times, however, you will NEVER see me do this on social media. Ever. It is always one of those moments that is instantly regretted, and often happens because of the rage that comes over me during extreme moments as a parent. Newsflash, I’m not perfect.
Maria Foy and family. Source: Supplied.
For the record, I do try my hardest not to swear. However on Snapchat, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc etc, I feel more open. I feel like I can express myself to you guys because you guys feel like my friends.
Do I speak like that to my kids – hell no.
Because kids are kids; and for the most part I try to hold my tongue (unless pushed).
If swearing offends you, then I am not sorry, because I do not swear to offend you personally. Please try and look at me as an actual human being – the fact that I swear does not define me as a person. I am about more than that.
HOWEVER, if you cannot look past this, then that is okay. Each to their own. It doesn’t make what I do wrong, it just means you don’t agree with it …..
This article originally appeared on HappyMumHappyChild, where Maria blogs about her adventures with her children, aged 2 and 4.
Top Comments
I thought I was doing well in watching my swearing in front of the kids but I couldn't help laughing when someone swerved in front us while driving the other day and a "f**ks sake" piped up from the backseat by Miss Three. I reprimanded her and the response was "But isn't that an idiot, Mama?" Clearly I need to watch my language while driving!
Does a 2 year old really understand that some words are adult words? Children soak up all our behaviour. We are supposed to set an example. By all means feel free to swear like a trooper whenever you please. I couldn't care less. Just don't delude yourself that your toddler understands the concept of adult language and language meant for private not public forums.