User Comments

nicmc April 5, 2023

The last time someone asked when we were having our second, I said: "we got it right the first time, so don't need to go back and try again." It might come off as arrogant, but it makes people stop for a second. The next response if they push is "I can't have any more" and it serves them right if they feel awkward. People will always find fault whether you have none or half a dozen, so as long as you can provide a happy and healthy environment for any children you do have, that's the only thing that truly matters.

nicmc February 12, 2023

In my very humble opinion:


There is a huge difference between forgiveness and allowing toxicity in your life, Ellie. There's a good chance those people who tell you to forgive would be the first ones to cry foul and tell you to run if you were talking about issues with a friend or partner.
At the end of the day, the only people involved in your decision are you and your father. You are healing. The fact that you have no ill will towards him shows this.

A general definition of forgiveness is an intentional decision to let go of resentment or anger. It does not mean welcoming back a person with open arms and allowing them to continue to hurt you. Being estranged doesn't mean you haven't or aren't in the process of forgiving someone. Sometimes it's the act of forgiving that allows you to cut ties with someone, not because you hate them for what they did to you, but because your growth as a person means you've moved beyond their reach.