@rosiecat I doubt her kids have usually travelled for 24 hours before going on a couch at home.

My 8-year-old daughter has ADHD. Since Mia revealed publicly her own ADHD diagnosis I have often thought that I hope one day my daughter has a partner who balances her out like Jason does with Mia, to see the positives in her creative and bright personality, and be the organiser for her. Jason and Mia clearly bring out the best in each other and thrive together.

Maybe it’s really not you at all? Women in their 40s are often so time poor, it’s not necessarily that they don’t want to be your friend, they’re just not putting in as much effort as you do. I hope you can persist - there are many other women like you who also are trying to make new friends. And also it’s not true that all women have a close knit tribe - even though it can feel like everyone else does.

I think when you first announced you were engaged I posted in the Mamamia Outlouders Facebook group ‘just don’t get pregnant’. 🤣 I accidentally fell pregnant 11 weeks before my wedding day. I threw up on the way to the hotel that night. Looking back, it was a beautiful day but the day by daughter was born easily eclipses it as the best day of my life. She’s now 12 and I’m sorry to say, couldn’t really care less to know she was ‘there’ on my wedding day. 😁 I’m so glad Jessie that you had an amazing day - and also I’m sure your best days are still to come. 

If two adults want to make a transaction that involves 'renting a womb', with informed consent around the risks, then I guess that's a question for them whether it's ethical or not. One question that wasn't addressed in this article is: what about the impact on the child? I'm not familiar with surrogacy but I do have some understanding of the differences between foster care and adoption, and the impact on a child of knowing or not knowing about where they came from.

I can totally relate. I was part of a high school group who all intermarried amongst the circle. The only reason I had stayed as part of the group was because my husband’s best mate was part of it. I tried to always be super friendly and nice. However there were a lot of insensitive comments and exclusionary behaviours. I would always leave get togethers feeling worse than when I arrived. I put up with it for about 15 years. A weekend away was the last straw for me too. Five years later, no one has contacted me since. My husband still sees his mate but not the rest any more. 

Haha so true! This article reminded me of the time I babysat my neighbour’s two boys - aged about 3 and 5 - for one evening while the parents went to a wedding. I was about 25 and had almost no experience with kids but I was enthusiastic. I was sooo exhausted by the end. I had no idea how hard parenting really was!

There’s a website called Direct Advice for Dads (D.A.D.) which is exactly about this - helping dads navigate the changes and providing advice in a way that’s relevant for them.

Going through this now with our six-month-old. Meanwhile my nine-year-old daughter has told me I am her fourth favourite person with Daddy number one. 🤣 It definitely doesn’t stay the same forever. But it’s great to hear that dads should support the mum as their most important job. So true!

I read Gone Girl because I heard it had an amazing twist but I found the ending so unsatisfying after such a long book. Any in this list have endings where the story is resolved in a satisfying way? (Without giving away spoilers of course.)

@mamamia-user-739637812 I love having three but as previously posted, I have age gaps of more than four years between each one. Still challenging in lots of ways but totally worthwhile.

@tesstify Yes I agree the age gaps matter. Mine were 9 and 4 when my third was born. The eldest can hold the baby if needs be, and the older siblings are both quite capable of doing basic things, even making their own lunch if needs be. Three under school age would be much harder!

I remember when I first found out about Alfie and Lily Allen, because I remembered that song ‘Alfie’ that Lily wrote about him, and how all he did was smoke weed in his bedroom all day. I was shocked that he actually turned out to be quite successful!