One thing Netflix is great at is creating a rom-com that is so formulaic and cheesy that you can't help but wonder if a rather basic AI chatbot thought it up.
And don't you dare for a second think I mean that as a negative. No, not at all. In fact, there's nothing I love more than a saccharine tale of good-looking people falling in love in good-looking places - all in a gloriously corny 90 minutes.
You can count every beat and see every twist at least 20 minutes ahead. And *that's* the charm of it.
Love Is in the Air begins with pilot Delta Goodrem defying orders to bring her silly lil sea plane back to base to serve paying customers.
She has to help a DOG with a SNAKE BITE so truly, screw the tourists.
An anti-capitalist queen.
Pilot Delta Goodrem's name is Dana and she has a conscience that is great for the people of her very remote North Queensland community but terrible for making any money to... fund it.
She arrives back at base and a man who is 100 per cent going to be revealed as her father says they're basically broke so maybe she should just let dogs with snake bites die.
"Dad," — THERE IT IS — "remote air support is the reason mum started Fullerton Airways," she explains.
Oh the emotional family business trope! A classic!
We quickly learn a few things:
1. Dana does not take any time for herself
2. Her mum's catchphrase was the highly original "do it yourself"
3. Her dad Jeff talks to photographs
Suddenly, double-decker buses and Big Ben tell us we're in London, and a good-looking man is giving himself a pep talk about how to pitch — GASP! — shutting down Fullerton Airways.
We also meet HIS dad, a venture capitalist who is a caricature for the disinterested business father disappointed by the son he barely knows.
The good-looking son is called William and he thinks shutting down Fullerton Airways will finally make daddy proud and get him promoted to the big wig nepo baby position he was quite literally born to have.
So he, and his suits, jet across the world to see the "very brash" Australians.
Meanwhile, the "very brash" Australians are playing darts, complaining about the cost of living and judging Dana's lack of love life.
Maybe they are brash, but at least they're relatable!?
What's not relatable is how everyone keeps saying the company's full name — Fullerton Airways — every damn time. If there's one thing Australians are going to do it is shorten a name!!! Fullo? Fullers? Even just Fullerton?! A glaring oversight.
The team learn at the last minute that Will and his suits are arriving... right now.
And if nothing else, I think this film was worth it to hear Delta mutter "wanker" under her breath at the sight of a man in a cream linen suit.
Will inspects Fullo's headquarters, confirms he is single thanks to a wonderfully clunky line of questioning from Nikki — who is a highlight, played by Steph Tisdell — and pretends he understands why their plane is called Harriet.
Within minutes, he is sitting shotgun next to Dana in the tiny plane. Someone spent A LOT on drone footage and you bet they're going to get their money's worth.
They complete a 'drop' to a community living in a remote bay, and Will plays football while Dana smiles.
I don't know about you but I think they might fall in love!
A local mutters something about bad weather brewing offshore, and it is clear that within half an hour, we will be watching some heroics take place in the rain.
Back in town, Will checks into his accommodation. This involves him lugging a suitcase so heavy that it simply must contain rocks and/or a dead body up a lot stairs. Then he sticks his head in the freezer because lol British man in Australian heat!
His dad calls him from his office in London which makes no sense because HOW IS IT DAYTIME ON BOTH SIDES OF THE WORLD. I hope we get a sci-fi twist where we learn Will can manipulate time.
Through a series of completely unexpected twists, Will ends up back in the plane with Dana the following morning - but not before Jeff, coffee in hand and without prompt, stares at the sky and says to himself: "Where else would you rather be?"
It's so unnecessarily cringe and I love it with every fibre of my being.
In the air, Dana and Will exchange flying puns, but then the plane malfunctions and the music turns this into a Mission Impossible film. I half expect Tom Cruise to pop up from the back, throw them both parachutes and jump out as it explodes.
She pulls off an emergency landing and then fixes the plane herself, with the plot ALSO giving Will a convenient reason to take off his shirt.
#Blessed.
They make it back safely, Will begins to ignore messages from his insomniac father and it goes from day to night in the blink of an eye, allowing Dana to walk him back to his accommodation while schooling him on the benefits of small-town living.
Like seeing the stars and having a father that actually likes you.
Then a koala starts screaming???????????
The next day, Will and Dana wrestle in the ocean and participate in the obligatory rom-com sport montage scene.
Nikki overhears Will as he finally picks up the phone and tries to convince his dad he was wrong about shutting Fullo down, right as a — what did I tell you!!! — cyclone hits.
OH, THE DRAMA!
As Dana, Will and Nikki hash it out, Jeff is in town urgently ushering all the tourists to safety. He isn't picking up Dana's calls and OH MY GOD HE JUST GOT HIT IN THE HEAD BY AN AIRBORNE TRAFFIC CONE.
Round of applause for whoever did the sound effects on that, by the way. The cone sounded like a sword being whipped around and that was cinematic AF.
Thankfully, he's fine. Will saves him and the music swells because #Hero.
As the storm wages on outside — it's a metaphor, get it!? — Will tries to convince them he really cares about the airline and wants to stop it from being shut down.
Why?
Um, duh, because he cares so much about a woman he met three days ago! She has made him a better person! This PLACE has made him a better person!
He's now hot AND compassionate.
Jeff says if the storm continues there might not even be a Fullerton Airways to save, which is a little dramatic. Turns out the only badly damaged company property is their sign, which has been broken throughout the entire film anyway (another metaphor!).
They spend the day helping others recover and whacking us all over the head with the value of remote air support.
Dana and Will reconnect on a random beach and... is she drinking a beer? EXCUSE ME BUT YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN FLY THAT SILLY LIL PLANE. Maybe I'm a buzzkill but I just think sobriety should be the number one rule of flying.
Just in case you're questioning whether Will has truly changed, he burns his tie.
Dana (allegedly) drunk flies them back to base and as they're about to FINALLY PASH — seriously this movie is SO chaste!!!! Let them kiss!!!!!! — Jeff interrupts to tell them it's official: the airline has been shut down.
So, with a piece of profound cricketing advice from Jeff and one last glimpse at the stars, Will heads back to London. Tieless.
Later on, Nikki is thinking out loud about how good life could be if you had an uber-rich venture capitalist dad who paid for everything. Suddenly, Dana has AN IDEA.
Because "do it yourself".
She flies to London — on a less silly lil plane — and storms an ITC-something Financials meeting.
"G'day," she says, because of course.
She pitches a business plan that frankly, I do not understand. Luckily there is nothing about his film that requires me to.
Will's dad thinks it's absurd until Changed Man Will decides that he never wants to wear a suit again/could work for Fullo.
"Don't you remember how that felt? To believe in something so badly that you had to see it done?" Will asks.
That is all it takes for his ruthlessly capitalist dad to throw bucket loads more cash at a failing business.
CAN I JUST REMIND YOU THAT AT THIS POINT, DANA AND WILL HAVE NOT EVEN KISSED.
Imagine deciding to move around the world to an extremely remote town for someone, only to find out that they use too much tongue or something. That's more risky than all the creative choices in this film combined.
Luckily, this is a cheesy rom-com so they finally, FINALLY, kiss and there is precisely zero tongue.
We quickly time jump and Fullerton Airways is TRANSFORMED.
There is a new, non-broken sign and a plane named after Dana's mum. Jeff and Nikki have chic new uniforms. But most importantly, Will IS DRESSED FOR THE CORRECT CLIMATE.
For the parting shot, we return to the unfulfilled sci-fi plot.
Magically, Dana and Will can lock eyes as she flies the plane above him.
HOW on EARTH can they see each other from that distance if not for SUPERPOWERS???
Dana flies off, allowing the drone operator one last opportunity to show off their very picturesque footage.
And with that, another 90 minutes of soothing, Hallmark-style not-super-romantic romance comes to a close.
If there's a better way to spend my time, like say... watching a better film, well, I certainly don't want to know about it.
Love Is in the Air is now streaming on Netflix.
Feature image: Netflix.
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