I was just getting ready for a relaxed night at a friend’s house. We were going to have a few drinks, share some laughs, probably end up ordering some Mexican.
You know, the usual.
But then it happened. The thing that would change my (beauty) life forever.
For some reason, on this particular night, I decided I was sick of slapping on some lip balm to finish off my makeup routine.
Sure, my lips were shiny (and moisturised) but it just wasn’t… adding anything to my look.
So I fished around in my roommate’s makeup bag (sorry, Bec) and that’s when I found it: a Kylie Jenner matte lipstick.
"Oh no, I shouldn't, " I thought. "I can't believe I'm about to do this."
But I was curious. Images of a pouting, 19-year-old Kylie had been dominating my Instagram feed for months, and it seemed like everywhere I looked (or clicked) I was seeing a story about her cosmetics.
So, I slapped it on. And, as much as I hate to admit it, I was transformed.
I was still me, or at least I was still 99 per cent of the person I was before I swished the matte creation over my mouth.
Except now I was at least one per cent Kylie Jenner.
I never in a million years thought that I would be standing in a bathroom, doing something to make myself resemble a Kardashian.
Don’t get me wrong, I'm an unashamed Kardashian fan. I even set the alarm on my phone to make sure I didn't miss Kim's robbery exposé episode.
But their beauty routines always seemed so far beyond the level of effort I bothered to put in to "make myself up" every day.
That night, the compliments came from left, right and centre from my friends.
If there would have been paparazzi there, they definitely would have snapped a few pics because I definitely, maybe looked exactly like Kylie Jenner (alright I am lying, but let me have this).
Most surprising of all?
The lipstick was actually really, really good.
It stayed on all night. It stuck with me through three glasses of rosé cider AND through a messy midnight meal of a Philly cheese steak.
It even inspired me to make a GIF of myself so I could pretend I was in one of those fun long-wearing lipstick commercials. WHAT FUN.
And, unlike every other time I had ever worn lipstick, my lips weren't as dry as the Sahara and flaking when I crawled into bed.
Of course, I was hooked.
The next day, I was scouring Kylie's cosmetics website adding almost every lip kit shade to my cart.
Love Bite? Yes. Maliboo? Click. Dirty Peach? HOW COULD I NOT?
In the end, I settled on three: Apricot, Dolce K and Head Over Heels. When they arrived on my doorstep, I ripped open the package and examined at my new prized possessions.
(And took a zillion snaps for my Instagram story, because if I was going to channel my inner Kardashian, I might as well give it everything I've got, right?)
Then, I ran to the bathroom took a long hard look at myself in the bathroom and had a minor existential meltdown.
WHO AM I? WHAT HAD I BECOME?!
I am not a lipstick girl. I don’t do "fancy" makeup looks. Bronzer + mascara = me ready for work, play and everything in between.
And yet, here I was, drastically shaking up the makeup routine I could do with my eyes shut (figuratively speaking... no one wants to see me trying to fill in my eyebrows in the dark) with, of all things, a Kylie Jenner lip kit.
A few weeks on and I'm still in love. I've grown to love and accept my new Jenner-fied look.
My phone storage, however, does not, because now all I want to do is pose LIKE THIS:
My lips have never loved me more and I feel like I'm putting in substantially more effort into my appearance every time I leave the house, even though I've totally cheated and just put on some lipstick.
Plus, it smells so damn good, so it's worth a try if only for that.