Does anyone feel like life just gets weirder with every passing day? Here we are, as human beings – mere specks within a speck within an impossibly ungraspable and complex universe and I can’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, our priorities got a little messed up along the way.
It was while watching the blockbuster chick flick Bridesmaids that I first heard the term. My brain, following the initial ‘what the?’ fleet of thought, made a bit of mental note to itself ‘(“must look that one up later”) and so I did…and was/am amazed at how far/low we’ve really come.
I’m talking of course, about anal bleaching, the latest craze in the never ending treadmill of cosmetic body treatments. So apparently for those of us who are offended (or not wanting to be the offender) by the natural dark hue of a butt hole, relief is at hand. Yes folks, you too can erase that unsightly rectal stain just like porn stars and gay men have been doing for years.
I must have my ‘derrière’ radar on at the moment as when I ducked into my local shopping centre the other day, en route to Target was a big , bold sign on the window of a new store advertising its service of ANAL BLEACHING for a mere $159. Hopefully none of the seniors sipping on their Earl Grey’s at the nearby Muffin Break had their reading glasses on.
At the informative website BleachBum.com I learned that a youthful appearance can be achieved everywhere. Excuse me for asking, but does a whiter anus seriously take years off someone’s appearance? Besides, whose really looking that close? Perhaps men who bat for the same team and have a more intimate knowledge of this particular nether region may partake in the odd dab of a bleaching cream but for the rest of us run of the mill types, it all seems, well, just a little bit much ado about nothing.
I’ve read about women opting for foot surgery so that they may squeeze their feet into the ridiculous and non-ergonomic designs of astronomically priced shoes (I mean, what kind of sadist designs shoes that require foot surgery in order to wear them anyway?) We pluck, spray, pierce, wax, laser, electrolyse, tattoo and jewel our bodies. We reduce and enlarge body parts, displace body fat and inject chemicals to numb, fill and plump our skin. Now apparently, our front bums are under assault. As if it isn’t enough for women to completely do away with all their short and curlies to be left with a chilly pre-pubescent frontage, we are now forking out serious cash to surgically tighten our vaginas and alter their appearance to make them more aesthetically pleasing. Vaginal rejuvenation is on the rise and leaving nothing sacred from the touch of the well-heeled cosmetic surgeon’s knife.
Australians now spend around $1 billion a year on cosmetic surgery. We may owe $50 billion in credit card debt, but at least we’re beautiful. I know I’m stomping on a well trodden path here but somehow, amongst all the pressure to alter, fix, nip, tuck and bleach, I just can’t help thinking it’s all just seems a little bit, well., um… anal.
Vajazzling, bleaching, Brazilian waxing, what’s your cut off point?
Top Comments
I've been married to the best looking woman in the world for nearly 30 years now. I've never asked her to have her boobs enlarged, labia trimmed, mons waxed, hair dyed, eye brows plucked or anus bleached. I love her to death and love her for who she is, not for what she looks like. I didn't start dating her to "improve" her or change her. I dated her because I liked HER. Believe it or not, many of my mates would say the same thing. The current generation of young women just don't seem to "get it". The best and most satisfying relationships are when you are with someone who loves you for who you are and when you can be totally relaxed and be yourself, not something a guy or this weeks "trendsetter" or (anti) women's magazine expects you to be or look. From my perspective, female to female peer pressure is the main driver for this sort of stuff. Some women just seem to be getting more....not sure what word to use here.....but maybe needy?, less confident?, less independent,?, more vulnerable to manipulation? Stupid? all hover around the mark. How dignified is it to kneal naked with you bum in the air at a "beauty" salon while some girl puts cream on your anus to make it whiter for her boyfriend? What indignity will you be asking for next year? Once upon a time, only your doctor and maybe your husband would ever touch your anus, not any stranger down at the local shops with a jar of cream. Are you really more "empowered" as a woman by getting your anus bleached?
All you girls know that 99% women getting this work done re NOT doing it for themselves. To the 1% that are, more power to you, but to the other 99%, come on girls, you are setting the women's movement back 100 years by not thinking for yourselves or respecting YOU.
I really liked your comment, if only all men thought the same way. I think all of this has to do with the explosion of the porn industry (via the internet). Now, so many men spend their time with the 'women of the internet' while the neglected girlfriend/wife is left wondering why she can't compete with a 15 inch screen and being able to swipe to a new virtual partner every 30 seconds. The damages of internet porn will be pervasive to society, we won't really know the full impact until maybe 10 years from now. The younger women are the worst off, because they don't even know what it is like to be in a relationship with a man that does not have skewed ideas of real beauty....
Well it's great that you and your mates are who you are with women but being a 20 year old female today with many make friends you'd be so shocked to hear what I hear. They make fun of overweight girls, talk about their appearances in the most gossipy tone and I've even caught a male friend eye roll at an over weight female stranger! Furthermore, I have many male friends wo are polite enough towards I but totally ignore my, universally more attractive female friend due to her weight as well.
Sure, there many men and women are happy with this natural variety of beauty but there are s many others (men and women) who have a one dimension view of what is beauty.
and i like it...say what u want, i dont care =)