I went to a work conference in a town five hours away with Simon, a colleague I knew only casually. It’s normal to hang out with other colleagues at these things, and I didn’t think anything of it when he told me he wanted to skip a session to check out a local bookstore. I went with him. We walked around the city and talked. Things were easy and comfortable and light.
Simon was ugly. So ugly in fact, that he seemed harmless. On top of that, he was older than me by eighteen years.
My husband is handsome. Why would there ever be something between me and Simon? I found myself thinking, justifying the amount of time we were spending together.
Inside one of the used bookstores we visited, he handed me a book and told me to buy it. “It’s one of my favourites. I love it.” I appreciated the recommendation and smoothed my fingers over the cover before taking it to the register to purchase.
Would you rather your husband have an emotional or physical affair? We ask the Mamamia office. Post continues below.
Over dinner that night, I discovered that Simon had been divorced not once, but three times, and he was recently out of a long-term relationship. I told him to download a dating app, and he casually sat and swiped on pretty women in the area while we chatted.
Top Comments
Simon had been divorced three times And was just out of a long term relationship. This wasn’t a red flag for you? You didn’t consider that if you moved on with him that it had less chance of working out? If you had so many issues with your husband, why didn’t you just leave? And the repeated comments that he is ugly are just unnecessary.
- "I was aware of how physically unattractive I found him"
- "Simon was ugly. So ugly in fact, that he seemed harmless"
I thought it was the unattractive/ugly men that women were weary of?
Ugh, I've been in a similar situation. Your head keeps trying to overrule your heart and you feel like you're going crazy. We're so conditioned to feel shame for leaving a marriage that we force ourselves to "work" on it when our hearts are saying no.