WARNING: This post details an incident of domestic violence.
R&B singer Chris Brown has attempted to explain his actions the night he assaulted then-girlfriend Rhianna in a car on the way home from a 2009 Grammy awards party.
Opening up in detail about the night, the 28-year-old dedicated an 11-minute segment of his new documentary Chris Brown: Welcome to My Life to talking about their “fairy-tale” relationship and the now-infamous night he left Rhianna bloodied and bruised.
“I remember she tried to kick me, but then I really hit her, with a closed fist, I punched her. I busted her lip. When I saw it, I was in shock. I was like, ‘F–k, why the hell did I hit her?'” he says in the film.
While Brown tells the camera he felt like a "f*cking monster" after the assault, women's refuge charities have accused the singer of failing to take full responsibility for his actions, instead going into detail about Rhianna's role in the fight, seeming to suggest that she provoked him.
The singer tries to contextualise the assault by explaining it was after a downward spiral in their relationship that had stemmed from him lying about previously sleeping with a former employee and then later confessing to it.
"After that, my trust was lost with her. She hated me after that," he says.
"I tried everything, she didn't care. She just didn't trust me after that. From there, it just went downhill because there were too many verbal fights, physical fights as well. Mutual sides."
"We would fight each other. She would hit me, I would hit her and it never was okay."
Listen: Mel Gibson is back and we're not all happy about it. (Post continues after audio.)
As Brown explains, at Clive Davis' Grammy party the then-couple were approached by the woman and a fight broke out in the car when Brown showed Rhianna his phone and she read a text from the woman.
"She starts going off, she throws the phone,'I hate you.' Starts hitting me. We're in a little Lamborghini. She's fighting me. I'm like, 'Look, I'm telling you the truth, I swear.'"
"She hits me a couple of more times and it doesn't go from translation to, 'Let's sit down, I'm telling you the truth.' It goes to, 'Now, I'm going to be mean, be evil'."
And that's when he describes hitting her with a closed fist, but goes on to say the fight continued with more blows landed and him biting her, before they pulled the car over.
His attempts to justify his actions in the piece have been condemned by women's support charities. As domestic abuse charity Refuge CEO Sandra Horley puts it, "Domestic violence does not 'take two'".
"Whatever goes wrong in a relationship, no man has a right to hit his partner. No woman can make a man hit her; violence is a choice he makes and he alone is responsible for it," Horley told Harper's Bazaar UK.
Abuse charity Women's Aid CEO Katie Ghose described Brown's language as "victim-blaming".
"Brown is sending out a very dangerous message to both survivors and abusers by relieving himself of responsibility for his actions by blaming Rihanna for provoking him," she told the magazine.
The way Brown, who pleaded guilty to felony assault and accepted a plea deal in 2009, introduces the topic passively also speaks of his reluctance to wear the full weight of the blame.
"Seven years ago, when I was about 17, 18, the whole Rhianna incident happened. That changed my life."
"I look back at that picture and I'm like, 'That's not me, bro,'" he says in another part. "I hate it to this day. That's going to haunt me forever."
You can watch the full segment here:
For 24-hour assistance call the National Sexual Assault, Domestic and Family Violence Counselling Service on 1800 RESPECT (that’s 1800 737 732).
Top Comments
Soooooo it's only domestic violence when it's towards women?
If she was clearly hitting him, BITING him, kicking him, it was a brawl.
How are we supposed to know the truth? Did we have a camera in the car to know how much damage she may of done to him?
He should not have hit her, that's for sure, but she should have stopped herself two.
Domestic violence goes TWO ways. A woman can most definitely be the perpetrator and I'm honestly a little bit sick of hearing about it only ever happening to women.
If this was the other way around and he took a restraining order out on her, took her to court, there wouldn't have been any media hype and I'll probably 100% bet that the police would have LAUGHED at him.
This doesn't sound like victim blaming. He's not blaming her for his actions, he is telling the world what happened prior to his actions which contributed to the anger.
I don't care about statistics, domestic violence doesn't discriminate.
Hypothetically, what is a guy supposed to do if he is physically attacked by a woman? And don't tell me it doesn't happen, I know it happens, but what is the politically correct response? If you've got an angry, out of control female hitting, kicking, punching and/or biting you, what are you supposed to do, and at what point are you able to defend youself?
I'm honestly curious. Thoughts?
Honestly, I think men (and everyone) should have the right to defend themselves. The issue is that it can be bloody hard for someone to check their force, and if they are significantly bigger / stronger than the other person involved it would be very easy to punch them once and knock them out / kill them.
I have never, ever thought that a man should just 'take it' and that men shouldn't be allowed to defend themselves against a woman if a woman is assaulting them. Ideally, considering the current climate, I would suggest that a man do his best to physically leave the situation.
Walk away.
It a hard one. I think you can use self defence, like a single hit to disengage and create space, but totally nailing her is not self defence. I don't think a man should have to sit there and be attacked by a woman, however I also feel hitting a woman is NEVER ok. I feel really conflicted by these situations. I am a woman, and sometimes I hear of situation like this and think, i don't approve, but I'm not sure what you expected to happen if your physically assaulting another person?
But let me add, there is no way he was creating space or acting in self defence. That was obviously a vicious attack and no matter WHAT was happening there is no scenario that flies in. Rhianna was a mess. And I don't think he is sorry.