Firstly let me introduce myself – I’m Emma, I’m 31, I work full time as a nanny, I love going to the movies, I am currently vegan and working on being nicer to our planet and I am utterly obsessed with my dogs (Sonny & CJ).
Oh and I still live with my parents; I always have and sometimes I feel like I always will.
I have worked as a babysitter since I was around 13 and started my first full time job the day after my last Year 12 exam and I haven’t stopped working since. I was lucky enough to work at a childcare centre that offered traineeship programs that saw me getting my certificate three and then a Diploma in Children’s Services. While working in childcare I also babysat regularly and became a casual nanny. Basically I worked 6:30am – 2:30pm at childcare then picked kids up from school and had them until around 6:30pm. I worked a lot. Since leaving the childcare setting (five-ish years ago) I have become a nanny full time and still working the same crazy hours plus stints of “live in nanny” while parents are on holidays. I have had breaks to go on my own holidays and I have also been lucky enough to travel interstate and overseas with some of the families I work for. I love my job and I think that I am good at it and I don’t intend to change careers any time soon.
You would think that working this much would allow me to be a home owner by now but sadly you would be wrong. I am single and I don’t earn very much money so the banks are unwilling to give me a loan for enough to buy anything, well unless I want to buy a beach box in Brighton but I think it may be illegal to live in one of those. I have a fair amount of savings but apparently that doesn’t matter to the banks, I need to earn ‘x’ amount monthly to qualify for a loan. So, I still live with my parents.
I am so lucky that, number one, I like my parents and number two, they let me live with them. We have totally separate lives, I cook, clean, shop etc. all for myself and I even have a separate part of the house that I live in that I have furnished and decorated to my taste. Living with them hasn’t held me back at all, hasn’t hindered my ‘becoming an adult’ and it hasn’t hindered my independence however it does give me a complex when meeting new people. Society doesn’t overly approve of this – someone in their 30s living with their parents. If ‘society’ would like to buy me a house or pay my rent then I would happily let them.
I know that I could rent somewhere or find some roommates and we could all live together and share rent and bills but that’s not what I want. I have been trying my whole adult life to buy a place and I don’t particularly want to waste money on paying rent if I don’t have to. Sometimes I wish I had a different profession just so I could be earning more money or sometimes I wish that people got paid for how hard they worked because I work bloody hard and don’t have much to show for it. At the same time, I know people who don’t work overly hard yet they are in a profession that pays really well. I can’t work out if they are the smart ones who have found themselves a job like this or if I am because I found a job I love.
It’s hard to find the balance of being a hermit and spending no extra, unnecessary money and enjoying my life and spending money when needed. Luckily I don’t drink so I haven’t wasted a heap of money on that but I do like a coffee and avo toast so maybe I should give them up. Also I have found that although I love being vegan and the amazing effect it has had on me, it can be so expensive!
There are times when I think that the world may be different for me if I had my own place. For instance I would love to open up family day care and be a foster parent, and one day (sooner rather than later) be a mum, all of which I can’t really do while living in my parents house. I wish I knew a simple solution to my predicament but I just can’t see one. As much as I try to believe that money isn’t the end all or be all of a person, sometimes it feels like it is. I know that many people are in my same boat currently and I know that many people have been in my boat but have worked their way out of it. To those people, please share your wisdom with me... aside from winning the lottery I just don’t see how in the foreseeable future I will be a property owner.
For right now, I live an incredible life and I am so very happy so I guess I shouldn’t worry too much about it all but the older I get, the more real my predicament becomes.
You can follow Emma on Insragram: @melbourne_nanny_life
Do you have any advice for Emma? Please share in the comments below.
Top Comments
Clearly this article has offended some people. I am pretty sure she was looking for advice not criticism. There is a nice way to give 'harsh truths' and constructive criticism and a mean way. Some of these comments are bit extreme. Maybe she does just need to move out and deal with it, maybe she should stay and save. We don't know the ins and outs of her family situation. My adult son lives with me and I love it. He is and always has been employed full time but it has been a joint decision for him to stay. He helps me with bills and I let him live rent free. This works for us. It is so hard these days to afford property by yourself when you are in a job that doesn't pay well so I applaud her looking for advice and shinning light on an ever present issue. Some of you need to get off your high horse and think before you type. What is good for you is not necessarily good for everyone.
Emma, do what you feel comfortable with. Some people have suggest a job change or further education, maybe this is the way to go. If you and your parents are happy with the situation then stay and don't listen to what some people have to say about it.
Adjust your expectations. If you want to buy a house, you have two choices. You either look for a house in your price range that might not be in a desirable area, or you look at your career and work towards getting different qualifications that allow you to earn more and to buy a house in an area you prefer. Living your dream job is all very well for you, but there's always someone else picking up the tab when people choose that path, whether it's a partner that has to slog away in a job they hate so the bills get paid, or parents putting up with a kid who should have long moved out.
I don't live in the suburb I wanted, but I have bought a house on my own in an area I can afford.
While you might be enjoying living your "separate" life in the same house, what do your parents want? What happens if they want to downsize their house or move, but can't because you'd have nowhere to go?