7 tricky words you've probably been using incorrectly.

You’d think a professional writer (moi) who has been talking the English language good for over 40 years would rarely misuse words.

But it happens all the time. I’ve done it on television and in print, and it’s mortifying. There is a particularly painful mistake in my memoir, pointed out to me months after it was published. I used ‘nadir’ (the lowest point) when I meant ‘zenith’ (the point at which something is at its most powerful).

I still brood about it.

Some mistake are common. 'Literally' is one of them; it means, according to the Oxford English Dictionary 'exact, without exaggeration or distortion'. If someone says they 'literally jumped out of their skin', there should be a pile of crumpled flesh on the floor. If you 'literally cried', there should be tears.

'Acute' is another. It's not the same as 'chronic'. 'Acute' means 'severe, intense, or of severe but short duration'. 'Chronic' means 'persistent or constantly recurring'.

I haven't made those mistakes, but I have to put my hand up for others.

Here are seven words I have used incorrectly in the past that I now use proper like.

1. Disinterested

Often used to mean ‘not interested’ as in “I’m disinterested in hearing about your yeast infection”. Actually means ‘impartial’ as in “I need a disinterested party to read my haikus to ascertain whether they are crap or not.”

2. Travesty

Often used to mean ‘tragedy’ or something terrible as in “I have a travesty of a yeast infection”. Actually means mockery or parody as in “stop making a travesty of my latest haiku”.

3. Peruse

Often used to mean ‘skim or browse’, as in “let me peruse that slim volume Useful Information About Parenting from Supermodels”. Actually means ‘to observe in depth’ as in “let me peruse that tome Anxi-Vaxxer's Silly Ideas about the Universe”.

4. Bemused

Often used to mean ‘amused’, as in “I am bemused by the current government’s climate change policy”. Actually means confused as in “I am bemused by the current government’s climate change policy.”

Must-watch: 'Weird Al' Yankovic sings 'Word Crimes' below. Post continues after video.

5. Enormity

Often used to mean ‘huge, enormous’, as in “I have an enormity of ironing to do”. Actually means ‘profoundly immoral or evil’ as in “I was shocked by the enormity of the ironing waiting for me at home”.

6. Chronic

Often used to mean ‘severe’ as in “I can’t have sex because I have a chronic headache”. Actually means ‘over the course of a long time’ as in “I can’t have sex with you in the foreseeable future because my headaches are chronic”.

7. Plethora

Often used to mean ‘a lot of something’ as in “I have a plethora of underpants that no longer fit me”. Actually means ‘more than is needed’ as in “I have a plethora of lacy underwear bought in the first year of my relationship”.

Then there is fo’shizzle, a word that has recently been included in the Oxford Dictionary. As in, ‘for sure that is a word that should never be used in any context whatsoever'. Ever.

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