A couple of days ago I came home early from work to find a man I didn’t know outside my house with a ladder propped up against the roof. Probably, it was the roof guy, I thought. Nothing to worry about.
But what if it wasn’t? Should I just trust that it was?
What followed was an experience and internal dialogue every woman has probably had at some stage; many times most likely. It stayed with me afterwards – not because it was a particularly frightening incident or very different to the hundreds of similar experiences like that I’ve had. Had I not decided to post about it on Facebook I would not have given it a second thought.
But because in explaining it to my husband, it made me realise how all women and girls exist on this level and most men have no idea that we do.
Here’s what I wrote on my Facebook page:
In less than 48, it was shared 1500 times, received 10,000 likes and reached 700,000 people. There were thousands of comments from women sharing their own similar thought processes and protective behaviour they are barely even conscious of.
Many many women tagged the men in their lives so they could understand how we feel on most days of our lives.
Some commenters missed the point and were angry that I was accusing tradies or all men of being murderers or rapists. No, no, no, no, no.
Not all men. And not all tradies! This was not about any one man and certainly not about any occupation.
Top Comments
Not only do I feel like this on a daily basis. I am being forced to live with this as a very real threat.
My neighbour physically assaulted me (completely unprovoked) a few months ago. He has also set fire to my propriety multiple times and carries a large blade. I thought I lived in a civilised neighbourhood! Unbeknownst to me though, the department of Health and
Human Services owns the property next door to my newly purchased home. They refuse to move their tenant on and he is allowed to refuse medical and psychological assistance, despite his violent behaviour. It's absolutely terrifying and no one will help me because "he has rights too".
Even the police can't help me because he denies everything. They say I need to have it happen again with witnesses or on camera. I don't want to become a statistic. A news headline. People say I should sell at a loss and move out, but why should I have to?!
Violence against women: Australia's says "Sure. Why the hell not."
Oh I wish I knew what to say to support you, except that I really feel for you and am outraged that you have to live like this without the powers that be helping you.
And the irony of this is that if you took the law into your own hands, which seems to be the only prospect left to you, you would be locked up and the key thrown away because your actions would be deemed premeditated.
Women are just more scared of stuff, end of story. They are not at any greater risk overall, just more scared by nature. The inconvenient truth of their biology.
I don't think you read this article. Women are generally biologically smaller, and therefore more likely to be overpowered by someone. Historically, more women are raped and/or murdered than men. If you think these facts don't effect the women in your life, then you need to talk to them. We are not scared by choice or nature, it's what has happened to other women in our exact situation - that could be ME walking home, that could be ME going for a jog, that could be ME going to work on the weekend to finish up some lessons... And as the article states, it's mostly a background buzz, but there are times that it comes to the fore - and it's not nice. I would love to never have those feelings. But it's just the world we live in. Please read this article again and think about it from a woman's perspective.
I have to disagree. Yes, we face some of the same threats as men. That is undeniable. Sometimes it's just a matter of being in the wrong place at the wrong time and gender is not a factor at all. However, it is proven that there is a whole category of people out there who specifically prey on women. The reverse is statistically much less prominent. Therefore, whether we're more scared of stuff or not, women are most certainly at greater risk overall.
Crime statistics absolutely disagree with you. Review AIHW or any government crime stats. So why, if men suffer more harm overall through violence, are we less scared generally. Simple. Biology.