The most compelling argument for why men should always pay on the first date.

Who pays for the first date? 

It's the age-old question that gets intertwined with values, beliefs and politics. Every woman I've talked to has a different reason on why they either pay, don't pay or split the bill on a first date.

"If I have a bad first date, I offer to pay the whole bill because I don't want to owe them anything," one colleague told me. 

"I usually offer to split the bill, or, if we're at a bar, we take turns buying rounds," said another. 

"I'm happy to split the bill but it's super attractive when they insist on paying," a friend said. 

And now I've just heard the most compelling argument for why men should absolutely pay. 

Speaking on hetero-romantic dynamics, TikToker Sam shared his (modernly unpopular) thoughts on why he believes men should be the ones to pay for dates. 

@samocain Thoughts on dating pt. 6372 #dating #fyp ♬ original sound - sam

"Us guys really have it easy when it comes to going on dates, especially a first date. 15 minutes before, I can hop in the shower, throw on the same button-down and jeans that I wear any other day, put on some cologne — I'm ready to go," he said. 

"For a girl, that's a process that is going to take way longer, probably involve makeup and hair and getting ready and smelling fantastic — it's a whole thing and we don't ever really have to go through that.

"So guys... buy the drink, don't ask to split the bill, pay for dinner. They put in way more effort than you or I ever will for that date." 

As someone who's been a big believer in splitting the bill on a first date, Sam has convinced me that I shouldn't. 

Watch: Horoscopes & Dating.

His video, which now has over six million views, made me realise that I put in way more effort into preparing myself for a first date than every guy I've ever dated. 

I have to plan my hair washing day to be the day before the date because I know that my hair always looks better on the second-day wash. 

I have to make sure I don't use any detoxifying skincare products because I want my skin to be as clear as possible. 

I have to plan what outfit I'm wearing that makes me feel good and look good, but doesn't make me look like I tried too hard (even though I definitely did try too hard).

I also have to plan my outfit around my menstrual cycle because if the date takes place when I'm PMSing, I know I'll be bloated. 

I feel better if I'm the one who chooses where the date takes place so I can make sure it matches a first date vibe, it's in a public enough space where I feel safe and I can make a reservation so we're not awkwardly waiting for a table. 

If the date is on a weekday, I have to plan my route to the date because I don't want to get sweaty but I also need to make sure I have a jacket that matches the rest of my outfit, and what do I do about my shoes? Do I bring them in a bag to work and change into them before I leave for the date? 

Now that I'm thinking about it, I should also bring my makeup case because I definitely need to do some touchups. Oh, and I should probably message my co-worker to check if she still keeps a hair straightener in her desk drawers as well. 

I think I should take some ibuprofen to calm my nerves and this stress headache. 

What if we hit it off? Just in case we do, I'm going to shave and exfoliate my whole body and clean my entire apartment. 

And... if I'm shaving, I may as well wear that uncomfortable underwear that rides up so high it touches places I didn't even know I had...

I can bet you that most women subconsciously do all of this (and possibly more) leading up to a first date. 

The only time I've realised how much effort I've put into a first date is a few hours before I'm about to meet them and I get a simple text saying "Hey, I'm stuck at work, do you mind if we reschedule?" 

Suddenly, it feels like a huge weight has lifted off my chest. Not because I didn't want to go on a date, but because I've spent close to a week prepping and stressing over how I present myself to a person who I've never even met before.

So yeah... I'm with Sam — the men can pay on the first date.   

If you want more culture opinions by Emily Vernem you can follow her on Instagram @emilyvernem.

Feature image: Canva.