sex

Shelly Horton: "The day I had my vagina smoked."

Image via Shelly Horton.

Yep. You read correctly. When I was in Bali recently I had a one-hour massage for just $13. It was so cheap I decided to treat myself to something else and then I saw a treatment on the spa list I could not refuse.

The V spa.

The fogging of the vagina.

Here’s exactly what it said on the spa menu (including cute translation issues):

For the fogging the cylent squats over a special wooden stool that has a hole in the seat as a warm, steamy mixed of brewed herbs rises into her privates for a tryuly unique cleansing process. Vagina Ratus are said reduce stress, fight infection, clear hemorrhoids, regulate meastrual cycles and aid infertility among many other health benefits. Rp. 1000.000

Related: “I made my husband vagina art and ended up in hospital.”

How could I say no? And it was only $10 for 20mins. There was no way I wasn’t trying it.

So I squatted on a small leather bound potty and allowed the burning herbs to waft up my down there.

And I filmed it. Natch. (Post continues after video.)

 The verdict.

A lot of smoke and mirrors I think. My Vjay-jay was a bit too hot. I had to jump off a couple of times to cool down.

When I jumped in the pool afterwards my girlfriends made sizzling sounds (in between sips of cocktails and puns about my smoking hot vagina).

Related: 6 things that make someone more likely to cheat, according to science.

Did I feel like it made a difference? Nope. But it was completely worth it for the funny anecdote! My cravings for smoked trout lasted days.

Would you try a V spa?

This post originally appeared on www.shellyhorton.com and it has been republished with Shelly’s permission. You can follow Shelly on Twitter here, on Instagram here and on Facebook here.