I babysat my brand new nephew for two weeks and boy did I learn A LOT.
It’s not lost on me that I’ve only dipped my toe into what is the most life-changing, overwhelming experience a person can have.
But there are moral dilemmas when you have a baby that I feel like no one talks about. Until now.
My beautiful sister had baby Henry three weeks ago, her hubby has gone back to work so I went to live with her as a spare pair of hands.
Henry and I went on many adventures just him and I and looking back, I’m sure I’ve broken some sort of baby handling law. I came across social hurdles and tried to jump them… and I’m still not sure in some circumstances whether I did the right thing.
First, let’s talk about going to a public toilet with a baby and where the hell to put it. The baby, that is.
Henry and I went out for lunch and I was busting to pee. There’s only the ladies’ cubical and I’m thinking “what the hell do I do with this child?”. I mean, I didn’t want to take him in with me, isn’t that a bit weird?
An elderly lady saw me standing there, perplexed and said she’d hold him for me while I did my business. Seemed nice enough but – is it okay to leave your child with a stranger?
WHERE IS THE MANUAL.
I figured I could run faster than the elderly lady so sat tentatively while peeing, listening to hear if she ran off. Also, playing out in my mind was my witness statement to the police.
Listen: We focus on several dad’s experience of birth, on a special episode of our pregnancy podcast. Post continues after audio.
“My Nephew has been snatched – well, not ‘snatched’ – let’s say, ‘given’ to an elderly lady. In the toilets. I needed to pee. She seemed nice and I thought I could run faster than her”.
For the record he was fine and I was very grateful to the lovely woman.
Upon reflection, I think I failed that test.
Next question; Is it okay to take a bub to the pub?
In my defence, it was ANZAC day and the plan was to sit in the courtyard in the sun.
But when I walked through the bar with my feet almost sticking to the floor and smelling the faint stench of cigarettes, I thought to myself, maybe this wasn’t the best place for us?
Final dilemma; the petrol station. You’ve JUST got your baby to sleep, the bowser and the counter are five steps away from each other and there’s no one in sight.
You fill up. Time to pay. Do you take the bub out of the car and risk waking him up? Or quickly duck in and pay while he waits in the car?
After almost giving the child away an hour ago I took poor Henry in with me on that one.
These are situations I’ve NEVER thought of – yet here we are. There’s so much guilt too, no matter which option you choose.
Having a baby is a minefield, and I was only babysitting one for two weeks. Hats off to you, super mums.
Are there any ‘moral dilemmas’ you’ve come across being a Mum and wanted to share? We’d love to hear them in our comments section..
Kristen Henry is one half of Kristen and Rod for Breakfast on MIX 106.3 in Canberra. Follow her adventures at kristenhenry.com.au.
Top Comments
Go to the parents' room if there is one where there allowances made in the facilities for this.. How about asking the actual parents what they expect you to do in these situations before you leave?. Quick phone call if you are caught short?.
There's rarely a parents' room in cafes; in fact, I rarely see them outside of shopping centres and airports (and even then, there's not many).
I wouldn't call the parents over something that seems so trivial, especially if they were at work. I also don't think it's necessarily common sense to ask them in advance what you do with the baby when you need the toilet. I'd ask what they need me to do to look after the baby, but would be similarly perplexed if I was in that situation.
Hmmm I'd be a bit stuck in these situations too. I'll be calling my sister who has three kids, for advice 😉