I had low-expectations for our nine-day trip to Bali with an 18-month-old recently.
As we all know, babies love routine and holidays are definitely not that. So in my worst-case-scenario brain we were going to be up all night, starting our day even earlier than we do at home and dealing with a lot of tears and confusion.
Sure, our trip wasn't perfect. But it was bloody brilliant, and I do actually feel refreshed, relaxed and rejuvenated now I am home.
Watch: Parents of toddlers translated.
What I wasn't expecting, was just how much my son would enjoy our holiday. He was thrilled to have 24/7 double-parent time, and would push his swimmers into my arms each morning keen for another day of pool, eat, sleep and repeat. While his sleep wasn't perfect, it wasn't woeful either, and he adjusted to the two-hour time difference easily.
He was in toddler heaven, and thanks to some carefully thought about booking and buying decisions, my husband and I were too.
Here's how we managed it.
1. For your sanity's sake, pick the slightly more expensive flight.
I read up while planning my trip, and learnt from my colleague's failures before me who wrote here, and here about booking the cheaper flights without thinking about what chaos they'd wreck on their kid's schedules.
I opted to spend a bit more for mid-morning flights that would encompass my son's lengthy nap of the day and thank goodness I did.
Entertaining a small person who is not yet old enough to be reasoned with is not for the weak. After changing activity or snack every ten minutes to keep up with my son's short attention span his mid-flight nap was luxurious.
It did take a nice big bottle of milk and a bit of wandering the aisles in a baby carrier to get him down, but my husband and I savoured the time he was asleep to recharge. Without it, we would have arrived at our destination much more frazzled.
If your toddler doesn't nap, consider timing your flight for their bedtime.
2. Two words: headphone headband.
My social media algorithm sucked me into this purchase, but I actually rate it.
Designed to be safe for little ears, the Kid's Headphone Headband off Amazon proved to be a great source of entertainment on the plane with their cute animal design. My son acted like I had produced magic out of thin air when I showed him how they worked.
They were also a great tool for helping him calm down before sleep. I swear by this Calming Undersea Animation which is soothing and gradually darkens in time.
I popped that into his headphones while he had his milk and managed to help calm his hectic toddler energy down enough to prepare him for sleep.
Once asleep, I just moved the headphones down into an eye-mask which kept him asleep longer than I expected on a busy, bright plane.
3. A tent for your pram.
This is by far the hack that I am most chuffed about.
Designed in Australia by mum Emma Lovell who was desperate for a travel sleep solution for her kids, Cozigo is an absolute lifesaver.
It's basically a tent... for your pram (any pram! It's universal!) or any on-flight bassinet.
It blocks out 90 per cent of surrounding light and most importantly is 100 per cent breathable and well-ventilated. This was by far the point I was most concerned about, but there's various zip and velcro areas to open if needed, and its breathability has been lab-tested.
Most importantly... it worked. Of an evening, we'd feed our son and do his night-time routine in our room before transferring him asleep to the pram. We managed to enjoy numerous dinners while our toddler slumbered peacefully beside us. It should be noted that this worked because we booked accommodation that was within walking distance of multiple places to eat.
There were a few little added hacks I worked out along the way; dine outside, preferably somewhere with a breeze (we stuck to beachside locations), and the hum of chatter and cutlery didn't seem to bother, but live musicians were too disruptive.
We stuck to quiet, dimly-lit al-fresco dining (which is my restaurant of choice anyway), and it honestly felt like we'd hacked the system.
4. Don't wing it, pre-book your transfers.
A 20 minute delay could be the difference between a happy toddler and a meltdown of epic proportions that ruins everyone's day.
For those reasons, we pre-booked all travel.
We drove and parked at the airport (mainly for the ease on our way home, which was very good foresight from us because our son was ratso by the time we touched down), and booked every transfer.
In Bali there was the added reason of wanting a car with a car-seat which is not actually a legal requirement in Indonesia. But regardless of that, booking a reliable service to pick us up from the airport and then pick us up when we were changing locations made everything run that much smoother.
The company we picked (Bali Family Safe Tours, if you're headed to Bali), were always on time, always air-conditioned and always clean.
It just made our lives that much easier and allowed us to remain relaxed on travel-days.
5. Resorts are the MVP of toddler accommodation.
Not hotels, not villas — resorts.
I thought about this a lot prior to booking, and my instincts were correct. Hotels don't provide enough on-site entertainment for a toddler, and villas are to hazard prone and/or boring to spend long amounts of time in.
Resorts, however, are perfect. They've usually got a few different pools or areas to explore, (and other kids to interact with), and it's all within a few steps of your room. The places to hang out in are enjoyable for both the parents and the toddler, and it means you're not stuck in some sh**ty piece of play equipment down the road that's nowhere near a pool-bar or a sun-bed.
Obviously this recommendation is very specific to a certain kind of holiday — one that includes swimming and warmth. If I was booking London in winter, I'd be out and about most of the day I am sure.
But I was after the kind of holiday where I moved very little, but still got to enjoy the benefits of a new place. Resorts for the win!
6. This very specific brand of swim nappy.
If swimming is on the agenda, buy yourself a couple of these.
I first found Happy Nappy from Splash About at my local swim school. They insist all students wear them because apparently they're the best at....keeping the poo from escaping.
They're a little pricier, but they remove the need to fumble around with multiple layers. My son would just wear these and a rashie.
There was no disintegrating disposable swim nappy to change, and they're that little longer on the leg than other re-usable swim nappies on the market, so have more sun-protection and look like swimming trunks, not nappies.
Also, we'd just leave them on while popping a fresh dry shirt on him for an hour to help him warm up while he had something to eat before jumping in the pool again.
Overall, they just led to less faffing about. Big fan.
7. Naps are for self-care.
My son does one two-hour-ish nap in the middle of the day, and this became our 'me' time.
My husband and I would take it to have massages, go to the gym, or relax uninterrupted by the pool for an hour each. Due to the nature of those activities, having the opportunity to spend the other hour resting in a dark room was actually lovely.
Instead of my son's naps becoming an inconvenience, or trying to make them work on the go while out and about — we embraced just heading back to our room and making sure he had a proper sleep, while filling our self-care cups.
In conclusion....
Before our holiday, we thought we'd be in desperate need of additional support — kid's club or nannies to help my husband and I actually un-wind.
I am sure when our son is older we will use both.
But the above hacks gave us enough me-time, enough relaxation and enough just him-and-me-time that we didn't feel the need to outsource childcare. When our son was awake, we were ready and willing to spend all of our time with him.
With our first proper holiday in the bag, there's very little I would've changed.
What are your tips for travelling with a toddler? Tell us in the comments section below.
Feature image: Gemma Bath.
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