13 things women in their third trimester of pregnancy know to be true.

I tried to go to the office yesterday at 36 weeks pregnant. 

On the 10-minute walk from my bus to my desk, my leg spasmed about six times and I had to keep pausing to rearrange my pelvis and catch my breath.

Once there, I sat in my chair and realised I had to either adopt an awkward lean back, or sit forward with my legs in a weird squat position to be remotely comfortable.

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Also clothes. Wearing clothes wasn't fun. 

I went to the toilet approximately 45 times, and the nausea was back, but this time with kicks to the vagina. 

Ah, the joys of the third trimester of pregnancy. 

Welcome to your safe space where we are of course so grateful to be here and to be able to carry a child, etc. But we're also tired. And uncomfortable. And perplexed as to how we're going to get even bigger?!

Here are all the things those in their final weeks of pregnancy know to be true.

1. The constant peeing.

Let's start here, shall we? It's relentless. Like, WTF? 

And when you do pee, hardly anything comes out. It's infuriating.

2. Cruel, unexplained insomnia. 

If one more person tells me "it's preparing me for baby", I will scream in their face. 

No. Just no. 

Yes, you're achy and overthinking and uncomfortable but there's literally no reason why it's 5am and you haven't slept since 2am, but you HAVE convinced yourself that you need to buy new baby bottles and different types of swaddles after finding yourself in a weird internet rabbit hole.

3. Being hungry 24/7 but having nowhere to... put it.

With your stomach squished somewhere up near your lungs there ain't a lot of room for... storage of food. But all you want to do is eat. And then eat again. And then possibly have a snack once you've finished eating.

But there's no room. And now you feel like a bulging piñata.

Oh, and did we mention the heartburn? What a delightful combo.

4. Aches in places you didn't realise could ache.

Legit everything hurts. Back, groin, stomach, legs, you name it, it's probably ached at some point today. 

If you're like me, you've been told to try a stability support belt to help hold your expanding body in place. 

This might just be a me thing, but I can't stand it. My baby's head is very much in my pelvis, and the belt feels constrictive. Oh, and it also makes me ache.

5. Swimming feels like magic. 

It's like pregnancy heaven.

You literally don't even feel pregnant in the water, and then you feel guilty for loving not feeling pregnant. But also, HOW GOOD DOES IT FEEL?!

All I want to do now is swim. 

6. Sleep-ins aren't a thing because it's simply too uncomfortable. 

No amount of pillows can prop you into a position in the third trimester that is perfectly blissful. Eventually, you just give up and get out of bed. 

Right now I am rocking my Butterfly Maternity Pillow under my back and belly, and TWO couch cushions in between my legs. It's the only thing that helps me drift off.

But once you've done a whole night on your side... propped up by pillows... you gotta get out of there quick smart. Standing vertically is the only relief. 

Oh, and there's that constant fear of waking up on your back to contend with. Honestly, you might as well just get up. 

7. Two words: lightning crotch.

Baby be strong in the third trimester and my gosh those little buggers can punch. Especially internally straight into your vagina, sending a lightning strike of pain through your pelvis.

My little man also likes to push against my stomach so hard that it eggs out in certain places and I have to immediately move positions in fear that he will literally come popping through the skin. 

Pregnancy is so weird. 

8. The goddamn nausea is back.

Ugh. You thought you left it behind (except for our friends with hyperemesis gravidarum, you poor things), but now it's back. And giving you some hectic flashbacks to the first trimester.

9. The swelling. 

Fingers. Feet. Face. It's all ballooning, along with your rapidly growing belly.

One of my colleagues Claire shared this delightful story with me, which has most definitely terrified me for my impending last month: "In the third trimester, I no longer had feet shaped feet. They were so full of fluid that if I tapped my heel on the ground, you could see it slosh around under my skin."

Sorry, what???

10. It's near impossible to dress the bump... appropriately.

Even the maternity clothes start to look odd. 

Sometimes I catch a glimpse in a mirror of my body and I am like 'WHAT IN THE WORLD?' During the third trimester, you grow so quickly it's hard to keep up with just how rapidly your stomach is expanding. 

(Oh, and everyone you see likes to remind you of this fact).

The stuff that does still fit? Yeah, well, those three items are on repeat...

11. Trying to wrap your head around the fact you could have a baby in a week or a month.

If you're just entering 'term', you'll feel this one. It's like a whole month ahead of 'waiting.' Will it be tomorrow, or will it be in four weeks?

If you're up the pointy end at week 40-41, it's just a constant mind f**k of thinking you're in early labour. Waiting, but trying not to think about waiting, because you don't want to mess with your oxytocin. MUST. STAY. ZEN. 

12. The nesting is next level.

It's... frantic. 

You've rearranged cupboards that definitely didn't need rearranging. 

You've repacked your baby's tiny clothes into their drawers a million times. 

You've scrubbed in places of your house that you've never scrubbed (and most certainly can't reach effectively this heavily pregnant). 

Every second day you realise there's something YOU FORGOT AND NEED TO BUY IMMEDIATELY. 

13. Feeling excited/terrified/overwhelmed with love already.

Cringe, yes. But the excitement to finally be on the home stretch to meeting your baby is like no other. 

It's all you think about. It's all you want to talk about. 

Your hospital bag is packed. You are trying not to think too much about having to do the whole 'get them out of your body' thing, and you're ready to give this whole parenting thing a go after nine months of anticipation. 

Congrats, mamma. You made it! Now we wait. 

Let us know the third trimester pregnancy symptom you know to be true in the comments below. 

You can keep up to date with Gemma Bath's articles here, or follow her on Instagram, @gembath.  

Feature Image: Gemma Bath/Mamamia.