By PHOODIE
We’ve had a few posts here on Mamamia about things we should and shouldn’t say to women, men, children, pregnant people, straight people, gay people, people who are suffering from illness, people with mental or physical disabilities and so on.
And today I am writing about things we are not supposed to say to kids when it comes to food. As I said above, I’ve often thought that sometimes people were oversensitive about what others should and shouldn’t say when it comes to certain things, but after more thought, I realised that these were “ideal world” scenarios as opposed to “you will be locked up and arrested if you break these rules” situations.
Whilst I do want to discuss what we aren’t supposed to say to kids when it comes to food, I also really want to acknowledge that we, or at least I, very often do say these things. Sometimes we’re stressed. Sometimes we’re not thinking. Sometimes we’ve had no sleep the night (week, month) before and we can’t see straight. And sometimes we just make mistakes.
I really like the ideas behind all of these suggestions and I don’t think that there is anything wrong with being aspirational. That said, it’s definitely a good idea to be realistic with yourself and know that at some point or another most of us have muttered some (if not all) of these things to small people, be they our own or the children of others.
1. “Finish every single mouthful on that plate or you are NOT leaving this table!”
Top Comments
Out of myself and my sister i have always been the larger one, thats not to say i am fat i've fluctuated and danced along the edge for sure, my sister being a stick no matter what she ate was what made the difference. My mother though used to continually make comments about my weight as a child and teenager and try and restrict the foods i ate and make comments to make me feel guilty about what i was eating,which she thought were subtle. She viewed this as helping me as she was as she describes obese as a child, unfortunately as a child who was already being bullied at school over her looks and other stupid aspects, i did not in any way see her comments as helpful and merely saw them as yet another comment tearing down my confidence and making me uncomfortable in my own skin. Whilst she has definitely reduced the amount in which she comments on my weight and food choices my eating habits and weight are still a topic of conversation that she likes to bring up every now and again, something she would never do with my sibling, who despite being skinnier than myself happens to have a horrible diet filled with junk food and other food that provide no benefit whilst my diet consists of far more healthy and nutritious food and exercise with the occasional cheat (which will always catch my mother eye and judgement). The whole idea of telling someone this will make you fat and you shouldn't eat that is terrible in my opinion, it breaks down a growing and impressionable child and as much as someone may think it helps the last thing a child wants to have their parent make them feel is guilty about their weight and the food that they eat.
Love this article and very helpful for me at the moment. I have two boys, one who had been 'fussy' since he started solids - plus I feel into the trap of making him his own separate meals until he was 2 then I snapped out of it and decided I was cooking only one meal and if he was hungry he would eat it. It has paid off and he now will eat almost anything I put in front of him. We do have the occasional melt down. My 2 year old has been a champion eater until recently. He has become fussy. And yes, I have said all too many times, if you eat this you can have ice-cream. Doesn't work usually. Actually I say almost all of the above - think I will have to reword what I say. Thanks again for this article.