“Personal space? What’s that?”
When I imagined becoming a mum, I knew it wouldn’t be all cuddles and kisses. I knew it would come with lots of nappy changes, messes, dreaded toilet-training and temper tantrums.
When I was pregnant with my first child, I heard over and over again from friends and family that we wouldn’t sleep again for at least 18 years once the baby arrived. We also learned that my personal hygiene would get neglected (it did) and that we would become obsessed with our new baby’s bowel movements. Magazine articles and blog posts only reiterated what those close to us said. However, there were a few things that these well-meaning people forgot to mention. You know, things no one told me about having kids.
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1. Moments of privacy? Ha!
Forget it. Children have an innate sense of when you want (or need) time to yourself or a moment with your spouse. They don’t understand why anyone would want to be alone. They feel like it is their job to keep you company, especially when you need to use the bathroom. I suggest a lock. Seriously.
2. Personal space? What’s that?
Babies and toddlers have no clue what personal space is. They have no misgivings about getting right up in your face. Not only will their face be right on top of yours, but every part of their body will be, too. For some reason, my three-year-old loves sticking her butt up in the air. Inevitably, it ends up closer to my face than I ever wanted. Never mind the fact that my youngest doesn’t understand that sitting on my face might cause me to suffocate.
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Top Comments
No one told me how funny my children would be, and how much they would make me laugh.
No one told me I would learn to do pretty much anything (except drive!) with a baby on my lap and a toddler or two on the floor. No one told me your mouth is very useful as an extra hand.
No one told me their faces would light up when I walk in a room. No one told me that my face would mirror that light.
People told me my life would never be my own again, but no one told me that it would be ok, because I wouldn't want a universe in which my girls weren't at the centre (not my entire universe mind you, my universe extends far beyond my home).
People told me that my life would be over, but they were so *very* wrong. They should have told me that as a mother you will learn the true meaning of being a super hero and that you will know that you can do *anything*, because you are *everything* to at least one person.
Beautifully said :)
Next time my girlfriend asks if I want to snuggle, I will respond with "Only if we don't have sex."
Genius xD
Well just never marry and adopt.