The weekend’s wild weather in Sydney meant that most families spent the days cooped up inside staying dry.
Undoubtedly it was the place to be. But when you’ve got young children, days inside can quickly turn sour with cabin fever setting in (sometimes as early as day one in our case.)
Here is a diary of being stuck inside during the Sydney storms.
Captains Log
Laying in
Back in the day, a rainy morning meant lazy hours in bed listening to the drops on the roof.
Not anymore. My kids insist on starting the day at the arse crack of dawn, regardless of the weather. Forget a lie in. I’m woken by a baby smacking me in the face and shoving her fingers up my nose.
I instantly hate my husband for his ability to turn over and go back to sleep by ignoring the possessed worm sharing our bed so I make sure to stick my ice cold feet on his legs and encourage the baby to stare at him at close proximity until he opens his eyes.
A cook up
A great way to pass some time is to get involved in a good old family breakfast cook up. It’s a fantastic idea until the fighting starts. This one doesn’t like egg, this one will only eat baked beans. For some reason they’re fighting over the colour of the dog, and the baby is intent on touching all the shiny, sharp, hot things.
Once we've finished mixing this I'm going to tell you I hate egg. Image:istock
After making four different breakfasts, watch your children eat about two mouthfuls of it and wander away from the table leaving you to clean up the carnage and eat their cold leftovers for yourself. Lucky devil.
Arts and crafts
It's mid morning and you're still convincing yourself that you can get through this without resorting to television.
Arts and crafts is a great idea! Kids love that shit. Bahahahahahha
Spend the time researching pinterest with the kids and set up all the necessary requirements to create some godamn masterpieces. This is going to be fun! Your dining table is now Mister Makers sexy dream. There's glitter, paint, unnaturally coloured feathers, sequins and stickers everywhere.
If you're a control freak it's going to be hard to back off and let the kids create their own stuff. They don't care that it looks nothing like your pinterest inspo. They're going to mix it all together anyway creating a mountain of brown paint; craft rocky road style.
Soon enough they'll be painting each other and as you march blue and green kids off to the bath you'll wonder why the hell you ever thought painting was a good idea. That's why you pay preschool, remember?
As a side note, no matter how hard you try; they will put paint hand prints all over the house. You'll be reminded of this day for the next week. Forget the many faced god, small people are the many hands grubs. It doesn't matter if you physically restrain them on the way to the bathroom, they will still touch all the things.
Card Games
Yes, some old fashioned card games are the way to go and Snap is always a popular choice.
Set yourself up in the living room and hand out the cards. Watch approximately one circle of cards go down until the older kids get annoyed that the baby keeps climbing over them, wanting to slobber all over everything. Hold the little one on your lap and enjoy her thrashing her head back into your chin in protest. Isn't this fun!?
Your husband is distracted because conveniently, the AFL is on TV and just starts flicking several cards on the pile regardless of whether it's his turn or not.
Everyone gives up pretty damn quick and now your living room has about 300 random cards that no one else seems to notice as they repeatedly walk through them dispersing them everywhere. Guess who gets to clean that one up?
Cubby houses
This is always a popular one in my house but a cubby to my kids consists of finding every item that's not nailed down and chucking it under a blanket. We are all then required to attend a 'Family cubby meeting' which is quickly adjourned when inevitably someone farts and dutch ovens all of us.
Role play/dress ups
On day two I suggested that the kids might like to play dress ups and put on a play for the adults.
I was such a smug bastard thinking that I'd bought my husband and I some uninterrupted quality time together (sitting side by side on the couch flicking through our phones).
That excitement was quickly laid to rest when their game of doctors and nurses required an amputation and the request to use a 'grown up knife'.
This isn't going to end well. Image: istock
Luckily, despite being in one of the worst hit areas of the storms we survived with our house and our health in tact. This post is obviously meant in good humour and our thoughts are with those who were not so lucky. We wish you all the best.