Well, well, well, looks like the Mamamia beauty writer has finally started.
In a statistic scientists are calling “exciting,” “game-changing” and “delicious on pancakes,” women use less than 10% of the beauty products they purchase because they’re not sure how to use them, or they use them incorrectly once and never touch them again.
Now, despite the fact that 100% of that statistic is made up, I think you’ll agree this information is scandalous, and definitely needs to be addressed.
And here I am! Scrawled pen on an envelope; ready to address.
First, let me introduce myself: I am your new beauty rascal, armed with (usually not even made up!) beauty facts and tip and tricks to make you feel confident and capable when it comes to your skin and hair and nails and even your ears, which need sunscreen and foundation too, you know.
I was the beauty director at Cosmopolitan and Harper’s BAZAAR magazines, and most recently, held a tyrannical editor-in-chief position at PRIMPED. I have never worked at Golfer’s Digest, despite those hurtful rumours.
I also wrote a beauty book called Amazing Face, which, to be honest, thieved all of my best tips and tricks, leaving me with only the following beauty tips to share with you here at Mamamia:
– Take a shower daily for less body odour!
– How to brush your hair!
– Don’t lick your lips because it will make them dry!
I’m kidding, you gorgeous, bright-eyed butternuts! I have literally thimbles full of exciting beauty tidbits that I will share with you weekly, like how to sneak into new season trends without spending a lot of money, or how to fool everyone into thinking you’re excellent at self-tanning, or how to make your hair look good when you have neither the time nor inclination to indulge it with attention.
I will also be posting weekly videos answering your beauty questions, which you can ask here, but not here.
But it seems somehow (“definitely is”) wasteful and dull to spend my inaugural post talking about myself, so allow me to swiftly sashay to some important beauty business, just to get the taste in our mouths.
Three Terrific Prodz I Swear I Have Not Written About, Ever:
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, $55 for a BIG bottle
Sweet cheeses is this marvellous. It’s S U P E R gentle, (kitten playing with wool, gentle) in part because of the soothing Argan oil and lavender and shea butter, but also because it was created, made, intended for poor lambs with ouchy skin because of acne or laser or skin-needling procedures like Fraxel. (I had some to remove some pigmentation, which is how I get the cleanser.) It removes makeup beautifully, it feels delicious and creamy, probably because it is, (which is great for those of us over thirty who probably shouldn’t utilise the foaming glory of, say Clean and Clear anymore). And it lasts for roughly 769969 years, because the bottle is so stinkin’ big. It is a clinic only brand but you can find stockists here.
Clinique Lid Smoothie Antioxidant 8-Hour Eye Colour in Cashew Later, $42
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Anyone whose read my previous beauty writing (Dad! That’s you!) knows I have had a long and gratifying relationship with Clinique Quick Eyes Cream Shadow in Muffin (it got 4.9 – FOUR POINT NINE! – on Makeup Alley) because it is the perfect, superfast, cream shadow, either by itself, or under powder shadow. Also, the particular shade I use, Muffin, is the most outstanding blend of bronze and brown and lilac. It makes green and blue eyes criminally alluring. So, imagine my heartbreak and aggressive glass-smashing when I went to purchase it in NYC recently to find it had been discontinued. I can honestly say I’ve never fallen so hard for a makeup item. I’ve been through maybe six tubes. And now it’s gone.
A minutes silence please.
Thank you.
Anyway, so turns out Clinique replaced Quick Eyes Cream Shadow with their new Lid Smoothies. And look, they ARE a better formula, and they DO smooth the skin on the eyelid perfectly and prep it amazingly for powder eye shadow, and they do NOT crease, ever, and sure, everything’s “technically” better, but they didn’t bring back my beloved muffin shade. So I bought the browny-taupe looking shade, Cashew Later. It’s a little lighter than I wanted, but it has a lovely sheen and really makes my eyes look devilishly awake, and I seem to be wearing it every day underneath all my other eye shadows, so I guess you could say we’re seeing each other. Buy it here.
Maybelline NY EyeStudio MONO in Silken Taupe, $12.95
What a use-everyday-gem-of-a-bobbydazzler this guy is. The taupe-latte-neutral shades are wonderful on every eye colour, and perfect with mascara for polished daytime makeup in about three seconds, and should be a staple for all of you, let’s get that straight. BUT. Did you even KNOW that this is a terrific base shade (over the lid up to the crease) for any nude/brown/smoky eye shadow work, and that, if you get it onto a stiff angled shadow brush, it doubles as a universal brow filler-er-in-er-er-er powder? It does! Just ask me, I know. Just be sure to buy the MATTE version, not the shimmer one. Here’s where to buy.
Yes, I really called you butternuts,
Zoe
Zoe's amazing book, Amazing Face
Zoe is an author and columnist. She has previously been the beauty director for both Cosmopolitan and Harper’s BAZAAR magazines, and the Editor at Large of Primped.com.au. Zoe has published four books; Air Kisses, Textbook Romance (which she wrote with Hamish Blake), Playing The Field and Amazing Face. You can follow Zoe’s tumblr here and her Twitter here.
Come back on Thursday to watch Zoe’s first reader question video!
Top Comments
I only have one complaint... once a week is not enough Zoe!
She'll be back tomorrow. In person (well on video) xxx
LOVE your writing Zoe - you're making me want - even though I thought I didn't need!
What I do need, though, is advice on big ugly old grown up acne. My good ol' teenage routine of slathering face in coverstick is not constructive these days and I know I can do a lot better with tinted moisturiser/mineral makeup etc … just don't know the best combo or products! Not keen on slapping on a coat of foundation icing each day. Also any advice on products curing the source so I be pretty first thing in the morning pre-makeup (hahahaha) would be much appreciated! Future post! Future post!
Thanks also for the geology link. That sand question has been keeping me awake at night.
Me too, me too!
I even went out and bought rosehip oil last week after a comment Mia's post, in the desperate hope it would help (it hasn't).
I need adult acne solutions that aren't uber expensive... please!
i had adult acne in my early 20s (im 30 now).
i spent a year being miserable, going to my gp, trying every prescription cream and otc cream and oiontment i could, as well as all the skin care products that promised acne free happiness.
finally after a year of no results, and a lot less money, i was referred to a dermatologist who put me on 'loaccutane' (just like roaccutane but slightly less strong) for 6 months.
yes its a scary scary mofo, you cannot get pregnant, and your skin becomes super photo sensitive and flakes off daily, but in 1 month my acne was 50% better and 3 months in it was completely gone. i stopped taking the meds at 4 months, as the acne stayed gone and didnt return, and i was anxious to get off the meds as soon as i possibly could.
here we are 8 years later and the acne has never returned.
The only thing i regret is waiting as long as i did as im now trying every beauty product under the sun for my acne scars and inflammation. will prob have to do ipl or fraxel at some point.
i offer this just as another option - the decision to go on any roaccutane type med is a biggie, and should be made after speaking with a derm, but depending on your acne, how long its been active, how many other things youve tried etc, it may be something youre willing to try.
i dont regret it for a second, as i said my only regret is that i wasted so much time being so unhappy and embarrased when a curative option was actually available.
anyway hopefully there are some good things skin wise that zoe can recommend - best of luck to you either way, i know how hellish it is.
Completely agree with the above statement. Both my sister and I suffered from acne all through our teens and early 20's. Tried everything under the sun - facials, expensive skin care, naturopathy, antibiotics - finally my sister got fed up and saw a dermatologist and got put on accutane. I eventually did the same thing - and neither of us have ever looked back. And our only regret is not doing it earlier. When something is that persistent, it's due to an internal imbalance - skincare will make no difference. Everyone is different of course, but it's definitely an option worth considering if you're really struggling with your skin and subsequent self esteem.