real life

What actually happens: When women accept compliments from men.

We have some important news reaffirming why you can never, ever, win.

Attention women: Not accepting compliments from men makes you a bitch.  But accepting them makes you a bitch too.

Such is the result of a small social experiment gaining momentum across social media today.

2o year-old Claire Boniface was bored of men offering unsolicited compliments on her online dating profile.  She would usually ignore the messages because “they ‘[boys] have no interest in an actual conversation,” Claire told Mamamia.

Claire Boniface. (Source: twitter)

The men’s reaction to her snub? Insulted, annoyed and even angry.

So, out of curiosity, Claire decided to start a social experiment called Agreeing With Boys When They Compliment You.

And it shows that as a woman trying to find meaningful conversation or relationships online – you’re damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.

don’t be all up yourself an stuff

 

The idea has sparked a larger campaign with other women adopting the strategy. Prolific tweeter Gweneth Bateman weighing in on the experiment:

It’s been taken up across social media with users posting the results of responding positively to men’s compliments and then being labelled as vain or unworthy of the compliment in the first place:

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you aint all that

 

 

lol. not.

 

Claire says the reaction online has been extreme.  ‘I have received a lot of insulting and offensive messages, which is ironic considering their issue with me is that I’m “rude”‘, she tells us.

no more compliments for you.
oh, right. thanks for explaining.

 

Accepting compliments is hard enough, especially in a culture which doesn’t like people who boast. I know women who would rather take a belfie and post it online for the world to see than deal with the cheek-blushing awkwardness of receiving a compliment.

Our reluctance to accept compliments is more often that not a reflection of our own self-esteem and feelings of self-worth.  Which  is why compliments can sometimes suck the fat one: we feel unworthy, and that makes us feel weird about accepting them.

The overarching advice from etiquette experts and manners coaches is just, smile, say thank you and move on.

Which makes this whole experiment even crueler. Because while these women accept the compliments, believing they are worthy, they’re then told they are not.

Are you able to accept compliments about your appearance? What do you think these men’s reaction says about how we give and receive compliments?