After multiple rounds of IFV, Brad and Claire Foord were thrilled when they found out they were expecting. Alfie was to be their miracle baby.
“We were over the moon,” Brad told The Project last night. Claire said they “honestly thought that was the hard part over, and that only the best was to come.”
But at 40 weeks pregnant, Claire noticed something wasn’t right.
Alfie had not been moving as much as she should. Then Claire began having contractions.
“I just said, ‘this baby wants out, Brad. She wants out.’ And… nothing.”
But the labour wasn’t progressing, so the couple went to the hospital where Claire was given an ultrasound.
“The nurse just looked at me and said, ‘I’m sorry’.”
That ultrasound was the last image they saw of Alfie before she was born.
She was “a perfect baby with nothing wrong with her”, but Alfie was still-born.
“It’s something that I would wish on nobody,” said Brad.
According to University of Queensland Associate Professor Vicki Flenady, there are over three million stillbirths globally each year. That equates to six Australian families losing a child every single day. New research shows that thousands of stillbirths could be prevented if Australian parents were better informed about the warning signs.
Stillbirths often occur after the mother notices a lack of movement. “She senses the baby isn’t well,” Professor Flenady says. “But often women delay reporting that until sometimes it’s too late. Women need to trust their instincts.”
Claire Foord told The Project she wishes she had been told that with Alfie, “because she really had tried so hard to speak through me.”
Now, the Foord’s rely on the photograph’s they have of Alfie to keep her memory alive. “That was our family portrait,” said Claire.
Gavin Blue, is a photographer, and after the stillbirth of his own daughter in 2006, he established the charity Heartfelt, of which he is the president. Gavin and the other Heartfelt volunteers donate their time and services to parents, capturing the final moments for more than six thousand families.
“Parents can remember the child the way they want to remember them,” he said. “They might have been in this medical environment with machines all around them, but through the photos, you see their child.”
Mamamia‘s co-founder and creative director Mia Freedman told The Project, “You want everyone else to acknowledge that that baby existed. Because that baby has existed for its mother for nine months.”
According to The Project, less than 10 per cent of stillbirths are the result of foetal abnormalities, which demonstrated the necessity to improve education when it comes to recognising the signs. Education and early intervention could save lives.
Professor Flenady told The Project women who are overweight or obese, women who smoke and women over the age of 35 are at a higher risk for stillbirth. That risk increases again for women over the age of 40.
The devastating truth is that some of the deaths of babies like Alfie could be prevented, and that makes Claire Foord angry. “She could be here, and should actually be here,” she said.
Since she lost her little girl Claire has established a stillbirth awareness group called Still Aware. Each year, on Alfie’s birthday, Still Aware holds a gathering for parents who have suffered loss through stillbirth to remember and celebrate their babies.
Last year, Brad and Claire Foord welcomed a beautiful baby boy. A little brother for Alfie.
“Alfie will always be our first born,” said Claire. “But forever our youngest child.”
You can watch last night’s full episode of The Project, including Claire and Brad’s story on TenPlay.
For more information or support services, you can visit Still Aware or the Australian Stillbirth Foundation.
Top Comments
I too had a stillborn daughter - back in 1969 - no ultrasound pictures, wasn't allowed to see her, or hold her ... she died because I had a condition, undiagnosed, called placental insufficiency, and the placenta failed to deliver oxygen for about 3 minutes of a 6 hour labour - at about the halfway mark. She was perfect in every way, and if they had known about the placenta, I would've had a C-Section and she would have lived. My second child was induced 4 weeks early, because of the same condition. My third delivered by C-Section because of it, and my last child the placenta was fine, but the baby had some reflux problems - both oesophageal and kidney.
"Australian parents were better informed about the warning signs"
I agree, I also agree hospitals need to do more. I presented to my hospital maternity ward at 34 weeks with reduced movement. My doctor wasn't on that day so one of the doctors on her rotation checked me over. He umm'd and ahh'd for a while and sent me home, even though I was insisting something was wrong.
I called my doctor at 8am the next morning who said she'd see me at 1pm, I was crying hysterically saying something was wrong so she said she'd meet me in the ward for monitoring. 2 hours later my daughter was delivered by emergency CS and we were later told she had little time left before we would have lost her she was in such a bad way.
So I feel a lot of mothers know when something isn't right, but if you have a doctor who just wants you out of there and writes you off as hysterical it's bloody hard.