Spiders make huge nest in man's pillow. He goes to sleep and then...

There’s no such things as monsters living under the bed, right?  Wrong. They’re living in an old pillowcase under the bed just waiting for you to go to sleep.

From the internet files of NO, NOPE, NO WAY and GTFO comes a story so impossibly nightmarish that we can only assume Stephen King is taking notes.

A man went to bed one night and awoke covered in thousands of spiders. And the reason? The pillow he was using contained a FUCKING NEST OF SPIDERS THAT HATCHED ALL OVER HIM.

Reddit user chicknbi had just got home, exhausted, from a 15-hour shift. The youth detention worker lives at home with his two younger brothers, who often grab stuff out of his room. On the night we’re talking about, he realised his pillow was missing.

Instead of searching the house for it, he just digs around under the bed, pulls out a long forgotten pillow and settles down to sleep.

Except, the pillow starts moving.

“Mmmmm” he thinks as sleep starts to fall asleep.

And then he realises:

THE PILLOW IS MOVING.

THE PILLOW IS MOVING.

THE PILLOW IS HATCHING SPIDERS. THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS OF SPIDERS.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED NEXT:

Cue spiders. EVERYWHERE. On my legs. Crawling up my back. In my hair. On my nose. ON MY COCK ‘N BALLS. MY COCK ‘N BALLS GUYS! Did I mention I’m arachnophobic?

Hundreds? You betcha. Thousands? Quite possibly. Millions? No reddit, not millions. I mean honestly… the sheer logistics alone of fitting a million spiders into one room… just stop it.

Anyway, turns out the abandoned pillow I spooned with had become a nesting ground for one huge spider and I burst all of the egg sacs with one fell squeeze of my sleepy thighs.

Yep,  that old pillow under the bed HAD A GARGANTUAN SPIDER IN IT THAT LAY THE EGGS OF A THOUSAND OTHER SPIDERS AND ALL THOSE SPIDERS DECIDED THAT NIGHT WAS THE NIGHT TO BE SET FREE.

(Sorry for shouting.)

They were free.

Our poor spider victim bolted to the shower and scrubbed himself raw.  He hasn’t been back in the room since.  He’s called the exterminator but says there is a good chance he will set fire to the room before they get there.

The old saying ‘Goodnight, sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite’ needs a new sentence tacked on the end: ‘Also, don’t use an old pillow you found under the bed either’ ‘cos a SPIDER may have nested in their and hatched thousands of other spiders.’