Sophie Monk's very awkward interview with Kyle and Jackie O: What's really happening with Stu?

Everyone, pause.

There is an update in the mystery that is Sophie Monk and Stu Laundy’s is-it-real-or-is-it-a-little-bit-over-maybe relationship.

On Monday morning, Sophie Monk spoke to Kyle Sandilands and Guy Sebastian on The Kyle and Jackie O Show, which, let’s be honest, is basically the Four Corners of Bachelorette-related gossip.

Monk told Sebastian, a guest host of the show and long time friend of Monk, that Laundy would not be her date to Tuesday night’s ARIA Awards. Instead, Monk will be taking her father Andrew.

… Interesting. 

“We are together,” she said, “we’re just not good at public PDA! He doesn’t want to be famous.”

Listen to Holly, Mia and Jessie discuss: Do we have a right to weigh in on Sophie and Stu’s relationship? Post continues after audio.

But, of course, Sandilands then stepped in, demanding to know exactly where Laundy was.

“He’s in bed asleep,” Monk said.

When Sandilands insisted he wanted to hear Laundy’s voice as proof (this is Spotlight level journalism pls), Monk responded, “I’m not going to wake him up. I can’t be bothered anymore. Everyone can think what they want”.

But Sandilands refused to drop the subject, concluding, “I think he’s not there”.

“I swear I’ll do an announcement when we break up, the second we do,” Monk said.

Oh.

She will do an announcement. When they break up. That sounds rather… certain.

Here we go again… ???????????? on @hybpa tonight 8.30pm on CH10. I adore @jane_l_kennedy! ❤️ @stulaundy44 Styled by @kim_capital_l in @blessed_are_the_meek

A post shared by Sophie Monk (@sophiemonk) on Oct 29, 2017 at 11:56pm PDT

“You say that as if it’s already predetermined!” said Sandilands, who then quickly backtracked and said, “Okay, I believe you. You’re not a liar, that’s one thing you’re not”

“She is not a liar!” repeated Sebastian.

What. Is. Going. On.

This may be the greatest question of our time.