It’s all very well for Tim Worner, chief executive of Seven West Media, to say he’s “filled with the deepest shame and regret” now. It’s too late.
His affair with Amber Harrison, a former executive assistant to the company’s magazine boss, reportedly took place more than two years ago.
He’s a married father of four; it should never have happened.
Today, it’s reported three of the four women Harrison named as having alleged affairs have fired off legal letters. Harrison writes in her letter to the Australian Human Rights Commission, she believed the network boss had sexual relationships with several employees.
Those women have been quick to assert that the allegations aren’t true and threaten defamation if they are named publicly.
What a nightmare. Is this what you risk when you seductively play with executive fire? Perhaps.
Whether they slept with him or not, one woman certainly did. Worner, 55, said of his fling with Harrison (who was 35 when he did the wrong thing), "This relationship finished some years ago and I apologised at the time, and am still trying to make amends."
Rightly so.
Just because you’re a high-flying executive, power shouldn’t go to your pants. It certainly doesn’t give you any right to drop your trousers for all the pretty young girls in the office and treat yourself to an ego boost. Or four.
That purposeful strut of power happens in offices every day, all over the world. Older man in sharp suit feels heads turn as he walks past. He notices the pretty young assistant looking up at him. He wonders, 'Would she? Could I?'
A smirk, a smile, a flirtation begins... He breathes deep and feels even taller as he basks in attention from someone who would never look twice at him in a bar, stripped of his seductive authority.
I get it; my father couldn’t resist his young PA either. Exit stage left. I was three years old.
When I was in my twenties, I looked at hotshot media bosses too. But, knowing the damage it does when a man in a suit is drawn to the flirty new toy, I always looked away.
Listen: Mia Freedman, Holly Wainwright and Monique Bowley discuss the ramifications of office affairs. (Post continues after audio.)
Don’t be fooled: this won’t make your career.
Sleeping with a married man is nothing to be proud of.
It’s not a game. It’s not a challenge. It’s wrong.
It doesn’t matter how long his eye contact lingers, you look away. It doesn’t matter one jot what email lands in your inbox or invitation is flung swiftly in a lift, you walk on by. This is not the time to prove you can catch.
You don’t accept gifts, you reject all advances and you certainly don’t pursue.
The damage it does to a family at home is indescribable, immeasurable and leaves a lifelong imprint. As a woman, even when you’re beginning your career and dazzled by influence or dynamism, you must respect that.
A man must respect the vows that wrapped the band of trust around his wedding finger, and every woman at work must respect the boss’ wife they’ve never met.
He tells you their relationship is over and he stays for the kids? Walk on by.
He says they don’t sleep together anymore or promises you a pay rise? Don’t look over your shoulder. Do not add a wiggle to your walk and do not flick your hair.
The harder he pursues you, and make no mistake he will because "yes" is the air that he breathes, the faster you walk away.
I have a girlfriend who’s in a long-term relationship with a married man who has young children. Every time she mentions him my skin crawls. It churns my stomach. I actually don’t know how some people sleep at night; this is such a crystal clear issue for me.
You may call that unrealistic; I call it a core value.
The older I’ve become, the more my respect for other people’s relationships has deepened. Making a marriage last is damn hard. You do not need a younger mistress shopping for low-cut tops on Saturday and planning a perky seduction parade for kicks.
A woman in a long-term marriage who has raised kids deserves your respect. Of course, every husband shouldn’t even think about having an affair, but don’t make it your bad karma if he’s a douche.
Do not get involved and you will never get in too deep. It’s that simple.
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Top Comments
I agree. The married person is 100% at fault here but i think it's best practice to avoid entering into a relationship where one person is married. It's never going to work out positively.
I have a relative who unashamedly sleeps with married men. It disgusts me. She doesn't give a rats. Once or twice she has tried to say that the married man is separated or leaving his wife (they weren't). To my knowledge she has happily been with 4 married men and thats only the ones i know of.
I don't know about anyone else, but when i am with someone, i want them to be 100% devoted to me. I don't want to have to sneak around or share that person.
This is the most ridiculous, idealistic view of marriage and relationships! I'm so glad it's 'crystal clear' for you but the reality of life is nothing is 'crystal clear'. Life is messy and blurry and to think otherwise is entirely naive. The woman in a long term marriage deserves the respect of her husband not another woman. Also to remove yourself from being the potential other woman is a joke. You have no idea what you might be capable of. We are all human.
Teddy, while we are indeed all human and capable of making mistakes I don't think it's unreasonable to treat someone (whether you've met them or not) the way you would want to be treated. I won't go after someone's partner because I wouldn't want that to happen to me. You may call it idealistic but then what is the point of marriage or even relationships without some form of monogamy. People make mistakes, it does not mean you should help the make them.