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The tap water at my sister's wedding was good.
I'm a non-drinker, and the thing about non-drinking at a wedding is that most of the things people say to you stay in your memory for a while.
I'm the eldest of four kids. My sister is the youngest and 11 years my junior, and the two boys in between are both married, and one of them has three kids.
Yep, this makes me the unwedded, unattached loser of my family. Or, as I prefer to describe myself, the greatest fun uncle that ever lived.
As with all family get-togethers, I was the kids' entertainment at my sister's wedding. My nephews and my niece (aged 10, eight and four) thought showering their uncle Matt with confetti was hilarious.
Matt with his niece and nephew. Image: Supplied.