couples

"I had an affair. Should I tell my husband?"

“I had an affair. It was stupid and selfish, I know. I ended it last night, should I tell my husband?”

This is a dilemma that a 28-year-old woman is facing and has taken to Reddit to ask for help.

The woman who goes by the name Seafoambubbles said she had been having the affair for about three months. She believes that unless you think it’s critical that your partner know about your infidelity, you should just keep mum.

“Telling a spouse about a past affair hurts the cheated party more,” she wrote. “I don’t think my husband needs to know. It would really hurt him.”

She doesn't think she has to tell her husband unless it's critical.

The woman then said not only is she worried about hurting her husband, she admitted she's already really hurt the man, 37, who she was having the affair with. "The guy I had the affair with is also crushed, said he loved me and doesn't want to lose me," she wrote.

The wife is worried that this 'crushed' guy may do something 'stupid' like try to contact her husband. "I don't know if he will, but I sort of feel like I need to get ahead of the story," she wrote.

The woman then goes on to explain that her husband had been unfaithful to her in the past and she wishes that she had never found out about it. "He had a brief affair with a woman from work. He came clean and I wish I didn't know to be honest," she wrote.

She doesn't want him to contact her husband. Image via iStock.
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The comments have flooded back with a resounding: "Tell him".

"Where did you hear that? That is so very untrue. TELLING him isn't what's going to hurt. Your betrayal and breech of trust are what will hurt. You need to come clean with him and let him make an informed decision about how he wants to proceed. You made those choices, now you must live with the consequences." z0mbiegrl wrote.

"The best story you can tell is the truth. Let it all out asap," backat_theranch commented.

"You can't take a decision on behalf of your husband and let him live a lie. You did something, you broke the commitment, your husband has to know about this and take his own decision about what he wants to do. You already did something utterly selfish and wrong, don't make a second utterly selfish and wrong thing. TELL HIM," Redhaired103 added.

The comments continue on the same vein as the ones above: There is no question, she has to fess up.

Do you agree? Does she have to tell her husband what she's done?