'I just did my own cervical screening test. Here's everything you'd want to know.'

You lie down on a table, on your back, in a doctor's clinic, legs wide open, your area out there for what feels like the world to see (when it's probably just... a blank wall), waiting. 

No, this is not the opening sequence of some TV show, this is your life. Because you’re about to get your Cervical Screening Test. 

And yes, I know it’s your doctor's job. Body parts are just body parts etc. That’s beside the point. It can still feel awkward as heck.

With that being said, I still really want my screenings. Not to be dramatic but it’s literally life-saving because it detects HPV before it has the chance to develop and potentially turn into cervical cancer. I do not mess around when it comes to my health.

Imagine though, that instead of going through the experience you mentally psych yourself up for every 5 years, you could do a self-collect moment? Meaning behind that curtain would be just you, yourself, and… you? And have that doctor coach you on the other side?

Well, my fellow cervix-havers, do I have some news for you. Self-collecting your own cervical sample is now a real thing in Australia, and I (yes, I) am going to try it myself to test just how long and straightforward it really is.

Don’t worry, I’m taking you along for the ride. So buckle up, we’re about to get up close and personal. 

Wait, what is a ‘self-collect’ Cervical Screening test? 

New changes to the National Cervical Screening Program mean that all eligible screeners (literally all women and people with a cervix aged 25 to 74) will be able to choose to have a Cervical Screening Test either by:

• taking your own sample from your vagina, using a simple swab (self-collection)
• having your healthcare provider collect your sample from the cervix using a speculum.

Both options are, of course:

• free under Medicare – so if your healthcare provider bulk bills for consultations, the whole thing is free
• accessed through a healthcare provider
• accurate and safe ways to collect a sample for a Cervical Screening Test.

So, when you head to your GP for your routine Cervical Screening Test every 5 years (please nod along because this is important!), your GP will kindly give you the option to self-collect your own sample during your appointment. 

If you're in the yes camp for self-collecting, your GP will give you a self-collection kit along with some instructions, then they will leave you in a private space to take the sample from your vagina, all by yourself.

Why is it so important?

An important tidbit to remember: the Cervical Screening Test looks for HPV (a common infection) which can lead to cell changes in the cervix.

An HPV vaccine is available, of course, and that protects against up to 9 types of HPV (including those that cause around 70 per cent of cervical cancers). But since the HPV vaccine does not protect against all types of HPV that can cause cervical cancer, you're still needing to have regular cervical screening even if you're vaccinated.

So, how do you actually... do it?

When I said I was taking you along for the ride for self-collecting my own sample, I really meant it. And in the spirit of being 100 per cent transparent throughout the process, let me preface it by saying that I broke my foot over the weekend and will be doing this while partially immobile, so I truly am testing the ease with which a self-collect test can be done. 

Step one: 

I’ve opened my kit to take a look at what we’re working with. The test looks like a large cotton earbud inside a test tube. Think of a COVID swab test, but basically headed for your vagina, not up your nose. On my oversized cotton bud, there’s a little red line that shows how far you're needing to pop it up there (for lack of a better phrase!). 

The red line isn't as far up as I initially thought! Image: Supplied.

What isn’t in my kit, is a vaginal speculum, AKA the vaginal opener device that doctors can use. 

If required, I am sure you can ask for one, but boy-oh-boy am I personally absolutely ecstatic that I can self-collect without one.

This is the test kit! Not much to it, right? Image: Supplied.

Step two: 

Friends! I'm going for it! “Already?” You ask. Yes! It’s a really quick process. 

Not that this needs to be said but PLEASE, for the sake of your cervix (a sensitive queen), use the soft cotton bud side for insertion. The other side is the handle and would be awfully uncomfortable if used for anything else. 

I’m standing (albeit mostly on one leg) as if I am putting in a tampon. I personally do a sort of ‘high-squat’ pose, hovering myself over the toilet seat, but I know others who put one leg up on the toilet or basin – it’s player's choice. 

Once inserted up to the line on the test (a couple of centimetres, I promise it's painless), you move it in circles like the COVID test in your nose. Or like you're swizzling a cocktail. Many of us would be familiar with that motion, right? You’re basically trying to get the surfaces of your vagina on all sides, or at least that’s what I think we’re aiming to do here. Again, rest assured it’s not painful, it’s not even that uncomfortable tbh. 

To reiterate: not for your snoz. Image: Supplied.

Once it’s been about 20 seconds of swizzling, you are DONE. Take it out, put it straight back in the tube it came in, and there’s nothing more to it. 

Funnily there’s actually no step three and I’m actually kind of... shocked. When I’d first wanted to try the self-collect test I was preparing myself for recapping a grand 10-step guide to self-collecting your own cervical sample. But here I am, swab taken, test done, back home and on the sofa, not really knowing how I’ve ended up on the other side so quickly. 

And with no pain or scaries (or that vaginal speculum).

How do I rate it? 

As far as cervical screening tests go I 10/10 would do the self-collect method instead of getting it done by my doc. Healthcare professionals, promise you're still legends to me!!! I just rather like the idea of having this collection within my personal comfort and control. Plus, it’s so quick, pain-free – and so easy I can do it with my broken foot in tow. 

Love to see another option now available in Australia, to help make participation and appeal for cervical screening so much greater. 

This is your sign to get your Cervical Screening Tests done if you are due for it!

All cervical screening participants now have the choice to self-collect their own Cervical Screening Test sample. Find more about it here and book an appointment with your GP for your next Cervical Screening Test.

Cervical Screening is delivered via the NCSP Policy which is underpinned by the Cervical Screening Guidelines. 

The Cervical Screening Test was approved for nationwide use and by the Medical Service Advisory Committee (MSAC).

The TGA does not prohibit or regulate paid promotion of cancer screening, including cervical cancer screening and self-collection.

Featured Image: Supplied.