The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 17: The biggest cheating scandal blew up and are we missing something?

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We open on Bronson telling us that he doesn’t believe the silly rumour going around about how Ines cheated on him with Sam. He just doesn’t think it’s the kind of thing she would do.

But Bronson. It’s exactly the kind of thing Ines would do.

Meanwhile, Cyrell is adamant that “RUMAZ DON’T START FROM NOWHERE!” and so true Cyrell your logic is, as always, flawless. 

“A grown woman with three kids doesn’t just make stuff up,” she assures Nic, and darling we feel like you’ve maybe been up all night having this conversation and we’re just sad we missed it.

Meanwhile, Sam's over in his room complaining about how hard it is to have a wife he doesn't like, and a girlfriend he's no longer interested in.

There are perfectly good people all over the world who are single how is it that THIS man has ended up with options fml. 

He thinks Ines is coming on too strong, ever since she sent him a series of strange messages:

Look.

We have one simple piece of advice for you Sam.

And that's don't f*ck over Ines. 

She's terrifying to people who are kind to her. We can't imagine what she'd be like to people who... never mind.

Oh.

Speaking of demons.

Mike is reading the paper with a collared shirt on and why are you dressed like you're going to golf we don't like it at all.

Heidi is trying to discuss why her feelings are hurt after Mike broke a promise at the dinner party last night but the biggest hurdle in their relationship continues to be that Mike doesn't give a single f*ck.

SHHH PLS it's the Commitment Ceremony and omg we can't even believe Kim Kardashian showed up tonight because what a week it's been, how's Khloe etc.

The experts inform us that we're one third of the way through this experiment and dear God how can that be when this show has already gone on for forever.

Jules and Cam are the first couple up and ugh we get it surely they've graduated from this experiment already.

"We told each other that we love each other," Cam announces and everyone claps and smiles except for Ines. Obviously. Who is muttering a Latin curse under her breath and, pls, Ines, let the nice people be.

IT'S MIKE'S TURN NOW and the experts don't mention that he clearly got lost on his way to the golf club which upsets us deeply.

They explain what happened the night before, and John Aiken goes f*cking rogue.

"What else do you need from Mike?" he asks Heidi aggressively and, oh, um, we don't know, maybe some who isn't... terrifying?

John Aiken explains that Heidi's just scared because she loves him too much and GOODNESS NO YOU HAVE FUNDAMENTALLY MISREAD THIS SITUATION.

She explains she has a 'feeling' about Mike, and we think that feeling might be that he is not that... nice. Which is true.

"I'm not going to play this game with you Heidi," John Aiken says and WHAT GAME, JOHN. WHAT GAME.

Heidi tries to explain that it's hard given that Mike is rude/breaks her trust/gaslights her/gets annoyed about her feelings etc. but John Aiken says she should give him the benefit of the doubt and why though?

At this point he gets very frustrated that Heidi is holding up his access to other couple's gossip so yells at them to make their decision. They both stay and Heidi reminds herself that if a man treats you badly, give him the benefit of the doubt. Always.

A number of couples choose to stay and that's all very nice but SHUT THE F*CK UP IT'S TIME FOR ELIZABETH AND SAM.

Elizabeth is wearing her trauma face which is appropriate for the occasion and tells the experts she's been a bit thrown by the 'rumour'.

"WHAT RUMOUR?" they ask, which is embarrassing because we were literally all at the dinner party.

Sam decides to tell the room that there have been times he's met up with Ines, and Ines responding "whhhhhat?" is the single most uncomfortable thing that's happened to us this week.

The experts try to establish a timeline of how the relationship took place, but by this point Sam has forgotten how to tell the truth so it gets very confusing.

First he says the relationship only started once the couples went to the Gold Coast, but then he accidentally mentions that, yes, he did meet up with Ines before that and sweetie we need to keep our lies consistent.

He then decides to announce that if he had his time over he definitely wouldn't have accepted the Instagram message from Ines and in hindsight he 'regrets it'.

At this point, Cyrell takes a deep breath, acknowledging that her whole life has been leading to this moment.

"WHY YOU LAUGHING YOU'VE JUST RUINED ANOTHER MARRIAGE YOU CRAZY BITCH," she yells at Ines and goodness Cyrell pls go on.

"THE WORLD DOESN'T REVOLVE AROUND YOU SAM YOU'RE NOT KING DING-A-LING," she adds and holy shit, yes, very well said darling.

By this point Ines has left the room out of (probably justified) fears for her own safety.

Sam and Elizabeth choose to leave the experiment which is a decision that is at least seven months overdue.

Listen to the latest episode of our Married at First Sight recap podcast. Post continues...

PAUSE.

Ines says she will only come back to the Commitment Ceremony if Cyrell leaves and this is the greatest achievement of Cyrell's life thus far. 

She grabs Nic by the hand and walks out to find a nice peep hole from which she'll watch the rest of the drama unfold.

Ines is back and can't stop smiling, mostly because she's planted 10 kilos of cocaine in Sam's carry on luggage.

The experts ask if maybe she thought about how her behaviour would affect other people, but Ines doesn't understand the (weird) question.

She explains that Bronson has been through a lot of trauma in his life so she's sure he'll be fine and who... says that.

But Mel can't get over the 'AH-MAZE-ING NIGHT' Ines and Sam keep talking about where apparently they only had one drink and one kiss but allegedly developed very strong feelings for each other.

"There was d*ck," Mel keeps muttering under her breath and yes there really was, we were there.

Both Ines and Bronson decide to leave, and Ines congratulates him on handling everything so well, given the circumstances. He's so traumatised he can no longer speak, but nods, appreciatively.

Trish reminds Ines that while this show is an experiment, "we ask you to hold on to your moral compass," and Ines a) doesn't know who the f*ck Trish is or where she came from and b) has never, and will never, own a moral compass.

Goodness.

Remember that time John Aiken randomly yelled at Heidi for no reason?

UNTIL TOMORROW NIGHT.

Catch up on all our recaps, right here:

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 16: Ines, you're about to get everything you deserve.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 15: The weird sex act that's divided the men and the women. 

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 14: An X-rated affair has everyone asking one question.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 13: The lie that's going to end in disaster. 

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 12: The sentence that broke Australia. 

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 11: The sex request that almost breaks Ex-Virgin Matt.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 10: This cheating scandal feels especially... mean. 

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 9: The commitment ceremony that came with a content warning.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 8: We finally know why Sam refused to contact his wife.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 7: We just watched a man lose his virginity on national TV.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 6: We have a shameful theory about the runaway groom. 

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 5: One man has concerns about his wife's weight and... no.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 4: The man who'd rather his woman not speak. 

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 3: A bride sabotages her own wedding and GURL.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 2: We need to talk about Ivan.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 1: A best man's speech just ruined an entire wedding.

And for more Married at First Sight 2019 recaps and gossip, visit our MAFS hub page. We've got you covered.