18 women on the final straw in their relationship.

Whether it's a six-year relationship, a two-month situationship or a hookup that lasted a few days, we've all experienced some sort of romantic separation. 

From speaking to over 20 women (and being one myself) it's evident that a lot of breakups don't just "happen", they've been building up over some time until they just couldn't take it anymore. 

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The last straw is that moment that made you realise it was final. It could be serious like a cheating scandal or it could be frivolous, like they ate their sandwich in a weird way... except we all know that it's never frivolous. 

Here's what 18 women told me about the final straw in their relationship. 

A not-so-sweet tooth.

"He never shared his favourite chocolate with me. He would actually hide it away and get seriously upset if I wanted a small bite. When I saw him share the same chocolate with his parents with such love, I realised what I was dealing with! Petty as it sounds, that was actually the final straw."

Under pressure.

"I finally had a grown-up tantrum about the continued lack of support in the relationship — emotionally and in parenting. I smashed all the dinner plates, food ended up on the ceiling, and I ended up in hospital with a cut finger that needed stitches and I didn't get out until 1am. 

The next morning he borrowed my car and called me, not to ask me how I was doing, but to tell me I needed to check my tyre pressure more often! That was the end."

Not my job.

"When my now ex-husband verbally accepted a job in NT (I’m in NSW) while sitting across from me on New Year’s Day. No consultation with me when he applied, which caused massive arguments and when he accepted the job, I made my decision to end my marriage."

Ignored.

"I was in the bathroom, looking in the mirror and crying. He walked in, reached in front of me to wash his hands, dried them and walked out. He didn’t even notice I was upset."

Eat your veggies.

"I broke up with a boyfriend because he didn’t eat any vegetables other than potatoes."

No vlogging.

"We were doing long distance and I woke up and he had sent me way too many Snapchats. They were long series of videos of him taking me around his hometown. I hated it. It felt like homework watching. I was overwhelmed. It was over."

"No thanks." 

"We’d been together for five years and I had a friend dealing with cancer whose husband was being unsupportive. I was curious and asked my partner "If something big ever happened to me, would you be there for me?" He said, "No, that’s what your friends and family are for."

I was floored, but grateful for his brutal honesty and in a way I wasn’t surprised. I left him the following day."

The ick.

"It should have been the cheating, but it was actually the card he wrote me in the aftermath that called me his 'sweatheart' instead of his sweetheart. The ick was irreversible. It’s a funny story now, but then, not so much."

No saving grace. 

"He spent his entire savings on a motorbike without discussing it with me. We’d been together four years, lived together, setting up our life etc. Always talked about how saving was important for financial security etc then one day I came home and he’d blown all his money on a motorbike. Literally had zero dollars to his name."

Full of sheet.

"After a long discussion about the division of the household chores (i.e. him needing to do more), he sat and watched me as I changed the sheets on our bed without offering to help. He did offer some criticism that I was doing it the wrong way despite him never changing the sheets or making the bed in our six years together."

Help.

"When his Dad told me to go and help his mother clean the kitchen after dinner because the men were talking about the state of the world. I was in the process of completing a PhD in Economics. I laughed and left."

Spill the tea.

"I asked him to make me a cup of tea while he was up and in the kitchen, and he bit my head off with such venom, obviously disgusted in my request. I sat on the couch silently crying, humiliated and devastated at the state of my marriage. I knew then we were done."

It's final.

"My dad was in ICU on life support. I was a mess. [My partner] picked a fight about nothing and screamed that we were getting a divorce. 'Fine,' I said. 'Yes, we are'."

No questions.

"He picked me up from the airport after I’d spent four weeks in Africa. He didn’t ask me one question about the flight or the trip. All he could talk about was how excited he was to show me what he’d been doing on his Nintendo."

Uncounted for.

"He 'forgot to vote' at the last election."

Skipping rocks.

"He went on a trip I couldn’t go on with my friends and their partners and told me that he got me something really nice because he felt bad that I couldn’t be there...

 He came back with a pebble... 

He found it on the beach and said he thought it would make me feel like I was there too."

Not a fan.

"I broke up with my boyfriend of six months because he spent his last $50 subscribing to a woman's Only Fans. The funny thing is... to subscribe it was only $4.99, so he bought 5-6 videos and pictures."

Pet names.

"In bed, we were doing some foreplay and he gets down to my stomach, grabs it with both hands and said... 'That is my jiggly wiggly'. He then said it again and again and again... Later that night, I cut things off over text, I couldn't see him again." 

If you want more culture opinions by Emily Vernem, you can follow her on Instagram @emilyvernem.

Feature image: Canva.