Reading this story brought back so many feels particularly those feelings of pain and that sickening feeling when you find exactly what you’ve sensed you would find. I had very similar experiences from my late teens to my mid-twenties and I too feel hurt to this day that someone could take my love and loyalty for granted. I was 28 when I met my now fiancé and I can confirm that with the right person you no longer feel mad, scared or have fears of them doing that to you. I’ve never felt more secure and loved and it’s the best feeling. All you can think when these thoughts keep you up at night is that at least you knew you deserved better and haven’t stayed with them just because it’s easy. Self worth is the most important step to finding the one. Hope you find that love soon! :)