When it’s genetic then that challenge is compounded. Both my kids and their dad have been diagnosed. Every day requires a hyper focus on them, heading things off at the pass and putting out fires. When my ex was diagnosed 6 years ago I really believed we would be the couple to overcome the odds, but the diagnosis for him had us frozen in our tracks. We separated 2 years ago and will be divorced soon. In the end I had to choose the kids - it was too much to manage three people with adhd and the kids find it much easier to develop skills and strategies. Their dad really struggles with it.