by KARINA MACHADO
‘What the hell did I just see?’
Call it a cosmic in-joke, but sometimes the otherworldly will announce itself at the very moment we’re engrossed in something entirely earthbound, like prising out the vacuum cleaner from beneath stacks of old towels and blankets in the bottom shelf of a storage cupboard. Richard Caldwell was doing just that one afternoon, on the second floor of his house in Emu Plains, west of Sydney, when he detected a shift in the space behind him. He stopped rummaging and swivelled around to gaze across the upstairs landing. What he saw has haunted him for over a decade.
Some memories blur with the passage of time, but not this one. Every year it grows sharper and glossier. Every year, he spends a little longer turning it around in his quiet moments. For this softly- spoken anaesthetist, the self-professed sceptic of his household, the puzzle is as multi-faceted as a Rubik’s Cube. Uppermost in his mind – why was he the one to see?
On a muggy January day, Michael Caldwell rings my doorbell. Over a work lunch one day, talk had turned to all matters spooky, and now the TV publicist is making good on his offer to take me for a drive to his family home, where his father, Richard, awaits with coffee and a ghost story. We head west beneath a fickle sky but rain still hasn’t fallen by the time we pull up, an hour later, outside their two-storey house. Large and commanding, with Tudor-style trimmings, the house on a park-like block opposite the Nepean River is the one I used to yearn for in my Enid Blyton-addicted girlhood. A Benji lookalike bounds over to greet us, filling out the edges of my old fantasy.
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I definitely believe in spirits, I've had way too many experiences with them to not! When I was about 7, I was sitting on the toilet (the most dignified place to be when you see a ghost!) and I saw a man, who at the time I thought was God (because he looked exactly like him), materialize through the curtains next to me. I distinctly saw the outline of a hand and a face before it vanished.
I've never seen anything that distinct since, but ever since my grandmother passed away, I constantly see whispy white formations in the air, unexplained moving shadows and white flashes of movement through the air.
At her funeral, we had the 'reception' at the actual crematorium because it was such a beautiful area with wide, sweeping hills and lakes, not at all like your typical derelict graveyard. I was sitting in between my mum and my auntie, who were both in conversations with people on either side of them. I was sitting, not speaking to anyone when I heard a very distinct, clear whisper of my name. I looked around, thinking that someone was talking to me but no one was. My sister noticed me looking around in confusion and she asked me what was wrong. To this day, I am positive it was my Grandma reassuring me she was still here, even if I can no longer see her.
I'm pro-science, and staunchly agnostic (if that's not too much of an oxymoron) re religion, but I believe in ghosts and other paranormal stuff. Just because we can't prove they're real doesn't mean they can't be.
I've had a few experiences but, unlike others, it's me that's been haunted rather than the house. My then-partner and I bought a unit off-the-plan a couple of years after my Dad died and lived in it straight away, so noone was haunting the building.
One evening I was quietly knitting and, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a man-shaped hole in the air. (Like the way you can seeing through frameless glasses and still see where the edges are.) I then saw myself cross the room, put my arms around his neck and kiss him. The feeling I had was so warm and loving and protected. I didn't recognise him, but one psychic I've seen suggested he was a past-life husband.
Twice I've felt my Dad's presence. Once was just a sense of his big, happy, boisterous presence which hung around for a few minutes then left. The second time was while I was watching a Getaway show about the HMS Victory in England. (Dad loved sailing and was building a model of the Victory when he died.) I again had a sense of his personality in the room. When the show was over I stepped onto the balcony and looked at the stars. I said something aloud, partly to myself and partly to him if he was still there. I then touched my upper arms and imagined myself hugging him, and suddenly it was just like I was really hugging him. I could even feel the contours of his chest and belly against me. I don't normally have a vivid imagination and have never been able to replicate the experience. (I saw the same program on repeat a while later and felt nothing more than sentimental.) I haven't felt him since, so maybe he was saying goodbye.
What a lovely post. Just one thing, you state up front that you are 'pro-science, and staunchly agnostic', yet you go to phychics? That seems a bit contradictory to me.
I'm agnostic, not atheist. Deities may or may not exist, but I don't have any solid proof either way so I'm open to being convinced about either possibility (although neither has so far). I have some personal experience in favour of the paranormal, which is more than I have for religion. As for science, it does a wonderful job at what it knows so far, but sometimes it forgets that it doesn't yet know everything about everything.