Gosh darn, only children have gotten a dodgy shake of the sauce bottle, haven’t they? They’re kind of damned if they do, damned if they don’t.
While ‘science’ has proven only children are more creative – intelligent, even – than those saddled with siblings, they’re also found to be disagreeable humans, socially awkward and spoilt in their loneliness (don’t shoot the messenger).
Now to add a sour cherry on top, new research has found those without brothers or sisters are also more likely to cheat in relationships. Great.
An ‘adult encounters’ website, Illicit Encounters has collated data on its punters, highlighting a direct correlation between only children and those looking for some side action.
According to their user information, only children make up their largest client base at 34 per cent. In comparison, 28 per cent of members are first-born children and 23 per cent are youngest siblings.
"It’s well-known that an only child can experience the feeling of immense loneliness in their childhood, and that comes back to haunt them in their future relationships," the site’s spokesperson Christian Grant said.
"Having been starved of attention for so long, it’s something that they find themselves in desperate need of. This manifests itself quite clearly when someone’s partner works long hours or travels frequently for work; the alone time for an only child just won't do, so an affair is the perfect short-term solution.
"On the other end of the scale, a middle child is surrounded by loving parents and siblings. They don't grow up with the same need for love and affection, but they’re also more than comfortable during moments of isolation."
LISTEN: Mamamia Out Loud unpack a listener's tricky cheating dilemma (post continues after audio...)
Now, we don't want to alarm you but there are more than one million single-child families in Australia. Meaning there's a good chance you could be dating an only child.
You might even... be one.
While we under no circumstances condone cheating (monopoly aside), we can't help but feel a tiny twinge of sadness for the poor, cheating only child.
Clearly they can't help themselves.
Are you an only child? Are you sick of being pigeonholed into a stereotype?