'I was sick of people commenting on my body. So I started a complaint form.'

Have you got something to say about the way my body looks? A comment on my cellulite, a word on my waist? When I show up on your social media feed, do you feel the need to share your thoughts on my tum?

For too long women have been silenced on the digital landscape and on our own personal social media feeds by nasty comments on our bodies: how we look, what we wear and what we do with them.

Watch: Sarah Harris shuts down body shamers. Post continues below.

My name is Alita Brydon, and I’ve got a pretty big following on social media. The Team and I normally talk about dating and relationships, but like so many of us, there are moments when I like to share pictures of myself online.

And why on earth not? Sometimes I will see a photo of myself experiencing a happy moment and think – damn, I’d love to put this snap into the universe! It’s nice to be able to share special memories on social with friends, followers and family, especially when the internet can be such a negative place.

The first time I shared a picture of myself in my swimwear online, I was wearing a baby blue bikini. The day was beautifully sunny, and just before my sister took the photo, I had been sitting on the sand eating a Bánh mì. Despite the mess I made with the soy sauce – which was significant – it was a great day! 

And although I was in my togs when that photo was taken – it wasn’t really about the togs. It was about how I felt in the togs. I saw my confidence shining through every pixel – and it was a wonderful feeling. 

So I took that smiley, swimwear shot and slapped it into the algorithm of everyone I knew. Facebook: you are welcome!

Image: Supplied.

There are not often pictures of women who look like me on social media – I’m a chonky lady with a tummy and thick thighs – and I was fully aware that when you post something on the internet, you can’t ever take it back. 

That image of me frolicking around the sands with my chicken nugget tummy chub had been released in the internet wild with no turning back. But I had no regrets. And as the comments started rolling in, it turned out I wasn’t the only one who liked the photo.

"You've given me the inspiration to get out there and flaunt my own confidence!"

"I really needed this today."

"Love this and I hope to emulate your confidence."

It truly felt great to be "seen". Seen as a woman who enjoyed her life, seen as a human whose body was an asset, not a hindrance, and seen as someone who was more than a body in a bikini. 

I really started to understand how impactful it feels when you see someone in the media who looks just like you.But despite all the love and kindness, what to do with those few comments that weren’t so nice? 

There were a few replies here and there that I could have done without. I already knew that chubby women on the internet can get some not-so-nice feedback, and I was ok with that. But it was conflicting – I didn’t want to give those sad little jabs any attention, but it also didn’t feel right to let the words sit.

Despite these reservations, and feeling very fine, I continued posting pictures of myself in my happiest moments, from splashing around the home pool, taking a dip under a waterfall, to sipping cocktails on vacay in Bali. 

I wanted other women on the internet to take up the same space I had, and use the digital landscape to share their own joy. We were out there living our lives, and if the potatoes of the internet had a problem with that, let them potato.

Image: Supplied.

Of all the life-affirming comments on social media that flowed in from those photos, there was one phrase that kept getting repeated, "The only opinion on my body that counts is my own."

And that’s when it hit me – the perfect way for me to deal with negative online comments, in the exact way they deserved to be treated. I’d set up a complaint form!

Well, not a complaint form in the traditional sense. I wasn’t interested in hearing unsolicited opinions about how I looked.

Instead of creating a complaint form where judgemental gym bros and keyboard warriors could have a whinge and submit their negative thoughts for me to read later, I set up a form on my website that simply didn’t work.

The buttons didn’t work, the fields couldn’t be filled in – it was a form that did absolutely nothing. Apart from waste two minutes of your life.

The next time someone gave me unwanted feedback on my bikini body, I simply directed them to my complaint form, where they’d end up hopelessly clicking around, wondering why the "form" was broken. Oh well!

The message was clear: I'm not interested in hearing feedback on my beach bod – my opinion is the only one that matters.

It’s been a few years now since I set up my complaint form and I have no idea how many people have tried and failed to use it. And I don’t care. 

I still love sharing pictures of my life on the internet, whether I’m wearing a blue bikini, dressing up for a night out or hibernating in my Oodie. 

And if there are people who aren’t into what I've got? Such is life! Digital space belongs to me – as it belongs to all women – and I’ll post whatever I like. 

See you at the beach!

You can follow Bad Dates of Melbourne on Facebook or Instagram, or me on my personal Instagram. And you can find the complaint form here.

Feature Image: Supplied.