Sorry Jimmy Choo, but the whole world knows Nicole Kidman doesn't look like this.

Shoe retailer extraordinaire Jimmy Choo have taken everyone’s favourite Aussie actress, Nicole Kidman and turned her into what appears to be a porcelain doll. Or a life size barbie. Or a giraffe legged, radioactive alien.

You know, because FASHIONABLE.

The designer powerhouse has just released its Spring/Summer 2014 campaign titled ‘Nature Unleashed’. The shots feature Kidman holding bags and wearing $4500 shoes that you could totally buy a cheap knock-off version of at your local Payless for $30.

But it’s not the price of the shoes we’re concerned with today (although $4500 for shoes, for real?). We’re a little more worried about the fact that Jimmy Choo’s people obviously believe that looking like a human being went out of fashion with last season’s leopard print.

2014 is all about the expressionless alien, girls. Mwah mwah.

Take a look:

Now, we all know Nicole Kidman is tall – so tall in fact that ex-husband Tom Cruise allegedly had to put heel implants into his shoes when they walked the red carpet together. Allegedly.

But Kidman is not this tall. In fact nobody is this tall. Kidman’s legs have been barbie stretched. They’ve been lengthened by a computer program to appear crazy slim and feel like they go on forever. And they do. Thanks Adobe.

We also know that Nicole has very radiant skin. She is a lovely looking woman.

But we suspect that Nicole has not been bathing regularly in reef oil or gone for the odd skinny dip in a nuclear waste dump. Seriously, there’s a glow and then there is radioactive.

The thing is, Nicole Kidman usually looks like this. Beautiful.

But what? Oh wait. Did you hear that?

It’s the sound of a gazillion Photoshop brushes going into overdrive ‘fixing’ this natural looking shot.

Today is only the third week of 2014 and we’ve already seen Katy Perry’s hands disappear, Kim Kardashian retouching her stomach to make herself look thinner and Cameron Diaz photoshopped to look bigger.

It seems that photoshop ain’t going anywhere this year. Maybe if we all ask Santa again in December.