6 Thursday news bites (September 8)

1. Government renames chaplaincy program, doesn’t force schools to hire chaplains

After a sustained campaign against the National Schools Chaplaincy Program, including a High Court challenge from a student’s father, the Federal Government has announced changes to the scheme. Schools who access the $222 in funding will no longer be required to hire a school chaplain but can choose to hire a ‘secular welfare officer’ if they choose. Previously schools could only hire a youth worker if they could prove they had failed to find a chaplain. The scheme has been renamed ‘The National School Chaplaincy and Student Welfare Program’ and both chaplains and welfare officers will be required to hold a minimum Certificate IV in Youth Work before starting employment.

2. Lady Gaga in Harper’s Bazaar … without the make-up

She never ceases to amaze. And sure, the cover is certainly photoshopped, but there is no denying we’re seeing a whole different side to the Queen of Weird. The Lady herself sums it up nicely: “I think that artifice is the new reality. It’s more about just being honest and sincere to the core of what you do. I think what has been lovely about my relationship with the public is that they expect something unexpected from me.”

3. Abbott briefed by Govt on asylum seekers … says onshore processing won’t work.

Any hope of some agreement on a way through the current stand-off in asylum seeker policy was dashed yesterday after Tony Abbott was briefed by the Government’s top bureaucrats. He thanked them for the briefing but said the ball was in the Prime Minister’s court. Meanwhile, the PM has refused to deal on a Nauru solution and Abbott has refused to deal on anything involving Malaysia. At this rate onshore processing will be the only option left … but Mr Abbott believes bringing asylum seekers to shore would cause ‘social unrest’.

4. In wake of London Riots, data shows more than 75% had criminal records

But what does that mean for the way they are handled in the justice system? Some in the United Kingdom have argued that sentences handed down following the riots were too harsh. Two men accused of inciting riots over Facebook have each been jailed for four years. Kenneth Clarke wrote for The Guardian on the riots and blamed them on a ‘feral underclass’ which had not been corrected by a ‘broken penal system’ and that 75% of over-18s arrested had criminal records. Five died during the riots across London.

5. Need some eating advice? Best not to refer to these plates…

A New York company that ships to Australia – Fishs Eddy – has created a line of ‘Intervention Ware’ plates which it says can provide a ‘heaping scoop of guilt’ with your meals. The plates feature messages like ‘Big Mistake’ and ‘It’s hard to be around you when you eat like this’ that are apparently meant to remind you to eat smaller. For what it’s worth, the company says the plates are clearly not meant to be taken seriously…

6. Artist paints 3D scene of Will and Kate wedding in Sydney

This is just cool to look at, Royal wedding or not. Artist Joe Hill has used the mysterious-yet-growing trick of painting on footpaths using perspective so it makes viewers feel like they are right there in the scene, when viewed from a certain angle. This scene is located at Circular Quay.

News brought to you by Rick.