A new mum has revealed her mother-in-law “snuck in” to the maternity ward and gave her newborn daughter precious snuggles before she got the chance.
The mum shared the story on parenting forum Mumsnet, telling readers she was especially upset after a “traumatic birth” that ended in an emergency c- section.
The woman – who gave birth six weeks ago – said her husband had called his mother during the labour for support. His mother also happens to be a doctor, who works for the same group of hospitals where the woman was giving birth.
“She was able to obtain access to the recovery area with her works access card, and just let herself in without permission,” the new mum wrote.
“I wasn’t asked if it was okay if she could be there, and because I was being stitched up on theatre still, she held my [daughter] before I even got to.
“I’m so angry and upset about this.”
The woman added that she and her husband had specifically discussed not having any visitors for the first few days after welcoming their baby, to give her time to recover and spend time together as a family.
To make things worse, the woman's mother-in-law was also privy to sensitive medical information.
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"A doctor came and spoke to me whilst I was in recovery and mentioned some very personal information about me, medically, which she then overheard too," she wrote.
"I'm actually in tears this morning thinking about it all again and so angry and upset still.
"I had a long recovery as there were complications during the birth and so have only just really processed it. I haven't spoken to [my husband] about it and wouldn't want to make him feel bad by bringing it up now but I'm really upset by it."
Other parents were quick to share their support for the woman, telling her she was completely justified in her anger.
"The intrusion was very thoughtless and the hospital staff (and your MIL) should have known better," one person commented.
"It's not acceptable... The trauma of the birth has been compounded by your MILs thoughtlessness, but don't let it cloud your thoughts and taint this precious time with your little one."
Others suggested she make a formal complaint to the hospital about their lack of security.
It's not the first time a mother, or mother-in-law, has overstepped unspoken boundaries when it comes to new babies: one tried to change the name of her daughter-in-law's baby.
Another fed a vegan child meat and this one gave her granddaughter a drastic haircut without parental permission.
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Top Comments
Would it have been better to let your baby lie in his crib waiting for you to recover enough to cuddle him? Your MIL also happens to be the baby’s grandmother, possibly one of the most adoring, selfless, loving people he will ever have in his young life. He deserves to have access to the people in his life that love him. And your plan to wait a few days with no visitors makes you sound like a princess. It would be cruel to make grandparents wait days before they see their precious new grand baby. Hopefully you will outgrow this tendency to get offended when things don’t go your way.
Geez. All these MILs. How DARE they hold their own grandchild, or give them food, or suggest a name? She just held your baby, it's not really the end of the world. it's not like a duckling, which would imprint on the first living thing it sees after birth. Besides, you were getting stithes or whatever. Babies need to be cuddled, it's for their own health. Is it really that big of a deal?