'I was experiencing mum rage every day, so I wrote strangers a message.'

As mums, connecting with other women is critical. But it can also be challenging, especially if we find ourselves overwhelmed with parental responsibilities, work commitments and/or the ever-present pressure of the household mental load.

And while social media may have many pitfalls, one of the best things about it is its ability to connect people, regardless of where they are in the world — or how isolated they may be feeling.

One mum recently shared her own struggles with the Mamamia Family Facebook Group, and she brought up a topic that really resonated far and wide.

Watch: Mum explains why she refuses to 'play' with her children. Article continues after the video. 

"Curious as to what other Mum's do to recharge their batteries?" she began her post.

"Mum of two under four, working part time, husband works full time. Feeling burnt out and mum rage rears her ugly head more often than I would like — but honestly, I don't have any hobbies or even know what my interests are anymore."

The community responded in droves. Dozens of women commented on the post, sharing their own stories of exhaustion and rage, and importantly, their tips for getting through to the other side. 

"Join the gym," wrote one commenter. "Alone time and good for mental and physical health! Great to let go of the mum rage."

Another wrote, "I walk the bay trail daily and if I ever miss a day, I feel the impact on my mental health. My walks are my time in nature with my dog and baby, and it's when I listen to my podcasts."

Another joined a women's basketball team with absolutely no experience.

"I can switch off while playing and it's about my team and me (no kids)."

Hip hop classes were the answer for one work-from-home mum, who found a class specially for adult women. "It's such a fun hobby in a non-judgement space."

Of course, it doesn't have to be movement-based. Along with exercise, several mums were stepping out of their comfort zones, making time for themselves to discover something new.

"I joined a Glee Club," commented one mum. "We sing once a week, various pop songs. It brings me so much joy."

"It's not a lot, but I find just zoning out and having something to laugh at makes me feel better," wrote one mum, who's quite happy for Netflix to help her unwind. "I also don't plan anything if I can help it on the weekends. Doing nothing on weekends is our new hobby."

That downtime can look however you want it to look, as long s it brings you joy or calm.

And making space for that downtime is crucial, according to psychologist Phoebe Rogers — as, left unchecked, anger can lead to depression and disconnection from others.

"Anger is a lot less socially acceptable to express for women," Rogers has previously told Mamamia. But it's important we tune into it, because usually, it's trying to send us a message.

"Anger is the best kind of emotional messenger, to reflect, assess and enact change," she said.

"It needs immediate attention; it requires rest and a serious re-evaluation of life. Don't let it linger and fester."

In the case of the mum who reached out for help via the Facebook community, that message was: serious burnout.

"With more attention than ever placed on a woman's value being based on her ability to juggle both professional and social environments, 'having it all' seems to have come at a cost where what we are not having enough of is rest," says mental health expert Tracey Horton. 

"Remember that old adage, fit your own oxygen mask first? It's a cliche, for sure, but cliches are steeped in truth, and this one applies to all aspects of life. Relaxation included."

Take the pressure off.

For many parents, the pressure to be everything for everyone is part of the problem — and this can include feeling like we need to devote every moment of our time to entertaining the kids. But Dr Daniel Golshevsky, AKA Dr Golly, says you there's no need to give your children your undivided attention all of the time. 

In fact, not playing with your kids can actually be good for both of you. 

"There are two important reasons why you don't need to play with your kids all the time: one has to do with them, and one has to do with you," Dr Golly told Mamamia. 

"For them, it's really simple. Independent play is essential for a child's development, playing without you is crucial for their growth… and it's crucial for us as parents.

"For parents, if you spend all your time playing, you'll end the day with an insane to-do list after they go to bed. Carving out space for you is essential. Not saying yes to every tea party, block build or jump on the trampoline can avoid burnout later.

"Every family dynamic is different, but when you can get the jobs you need done, it means, when you do get time to play with your kids, you can truly enjoy it. Independent play skills are not a switch you can flick — they are learnt in increments over time."

And if you're welcoming a new baby in the setting of a toddler? In Dr Golly's opinion, independent play skills are essential. "If you'd like help building these skills in your family, they're all in my Toddler Toolkit parenting program, written with Paediatric Psychologist Amanada Abel."

Tips for finding time for you.

If you're finding taking time out for yourself difficult, try these tips:

Feature image: Getty.